December 27, 2010

Going Home

We are going home in my country for a vacation.
I have mixed feelings about this.
I am excited, giddy, nervous, and anxious.
I am pretty sure I will experience some culture shock 
in my own culture sometime.
It's been a long, long time.
I'm not sure if I am still used to riding jeepneys and passing
my "bayad" (payment) from one passenger to another to the driver,
unless I'm sitting behind the driver's seat or 
the passenger's seat.
I'm not sure if I am still used to use "tabo" and "timba"
(dipper and bucket) 
to take a shower - a cold shower, even.
I hope it's at least lukewarm... but I don't recall our showers
back home being lukewarm unless we boil some water.
I'm not sure if I am still used to getting burned 
by the hot sun, like how it feels like
when you're standing close to the fire in a bon fire.
I would probably stand out in the crowd,
what with my darker skin than before 
(back home the fairer you are, the more beautiful you are),  
unmanaged wavy hair 
(most, if not all, people there have straightened their hair permanently)
and poor sense of style
(people out there can go crazy with their outfits).

When I left, I was a 19-year old girl with 2 1/2 semesters left
to finish my bachelor's degree in Computer Science.
I had a few friends in our Church, and a lot more outside the Church.
I didn't think of anybody else but myself and my family.
I was worried about going to a foreign land,
not knowing anybody,
and having to speak in a different language (that I already knew at least).
I actually didn't feel anything else other than that.
I was already planning then to return home for a vacation a year after - which
turned into 2 years, 3 years, and so on.
Who knew I wouldn't be able to go home even 2 1/2 years after I graduated 
and got my bachelor's degree in Information Systems?
Certainly not me.

Fast forward 6 1/2 years, I am now in my mid-20's,
a wife and a stay-home mom with a toddler
with a whole different circle of friends, and most of them 
are members of our Church.
They were not just all Filipinos, but a mixture of different nationalities.
I didn't have my degree when I left.
Now I have it.
I am accustomed to the cultures of my new home,
and am now nervous to be soaked in my own culture in my native land.

I am excited for Jesse.
He's been looking forward to visiting his mission area
ever since before he met me.
I'm looking forward to him meeting my siblings for the first time.
I'm looking forward to showing him some historical places Manila,
which he was never really able to visit when he was on his mission,
and also places were I grew up.
We always moved from one apartment to another (up until now).
I am really excited to spending time with him in the country that we both love.

I am excited for Caleb.
He'll finally be able to meet his uncles and aunts,
and his cousins.
He will be soaked, at least even just for three weeks,
in his mother's native language.
And he'll be able to see the land of his "other citizenship"
(we just found out recently that he's a naturally born dual citizen - American and Filipino).


  1. Have a great time making wonderful memories with your family!

  2. So our kids are naturally borned dual citizens?AWESOME!

    And I am so excited for you guys.Enjoy every minutes of it.Don't forget to go to mall of Asia and eat at Kongo grill and other yummy places.Fort Santiago is a cool place too.

    And don't forget to call the Gellors hahahah!

  3. I'm so excited for you guys! I know you'll have a great time. I'm sad that you won't be here for our first few weeks at church, but we'll have to hang out when you get back! Have fun!


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