June 23, 2013

The Introvert ME

I haven't blogged in a long time, obviously. Honestly it's because I lost the interest and got lazy because nobody else was reading but my sisters-in-law and my mother-in-law. But considering that my kids still take their naps, the 1.5 - 2.5 hrs. that I am alone was quite long enough to not do anything else but read books and/or write in my journal. So I've decided to try to at least get back into blogging bit by bit.

Well, I got bored [seems like I always am] of my old blog title "Mommy Musings" so I changed it into something more fitting for my personality. Anyone who knew me REALLY well will agree that I am an introvert.

Growing up, I always preferred being with a small circle of friends rather than a huge crowd of acquaintances. I was never fond of going to youth activities in our Church because trying to strike conversations with other youths and socializing was never my favorite thing to do. If it was a youth dance, I was basically a wallflower... all. night. long.

I overcame a bit of my introversion when I left my family and my country to take up my undergraduate degree in BYU-Hawai'i. I was in a strange land with a totally different culture. And though I knew English well enough, I knew I wouldn't last long if I kept on being an introvert. So I made friends. And friends I had but not to the point that all of them were my close friends (unlike someone I know from there, too! She's a sweetheart!) I had a handful of really close friends prior to being a "Mrs." - 3 of them exactly. The rest I knew because it was a small University and you almost know everyone there. And when the 3 close friends left and moved on (one got married, the other two went on their missions for our Church), I struggled to find new close friends. So I just remained FRIENDS with everybody else I knew. It didn't matter that I didn't hung-out with them like the way I did with my three friends. It was good enough for me that I was not keeping to myself so much anymore.

But an event in my life happened and ... I lost that trust in friends. So now I am back to my introversion again. And ever since we had our firstborn, it seemed like I really just preferred being by myself and with our boys rather than arranging a playdate and trying to be sociable, or trying to make friends all over again. I was happy in my own thoughts most of the time, and just playing with my kids. Heck, even my husband and I don't talk much after the kids go down to bed because I don't talk even though my brain was exploding with ideas of things to do, or to talk about, or just random thoughts [and he likes my silence sometimes so he could "watch" some baseball games in peace.. haha!]

I am not saying I am a snob. No. I don't even mean to be one if I come across as such. I like talking to people. But almost ALWAYS I will not be the first one to strike a conversation. It's like a stage freight for me. Sometimes I could do it, sometimes I couldn't. I realized that more when I became a mother. I am so quiet you could almost say I'm a snob. But once someone talks to me, I talk to them like I wasn't ever shy at all.

So, yes. After decades of thinking that I am probably just shy, I've finally come to accept that this is me. I am an introvert who likes to chatter away by writing!

When I was trying to come up with a new title for this blog (and it might still change), I wanted to add the word "introvert" because you wouldn't know I am one by just reading this blog. I chatter so much in my blogs and journals. So I decided to google the definition of the word to see if it is really my personality.

Here's a couple:


And just for fun... are you an introvert or extrovert? Take the quiz and see! 

And lastly, my boys today, doing what boys do best - BEING BOYS! They love playing with each other. And no, my little J (the baby on upper shelf) is 2 years, 2 months, and 2 days younger than C (the kid on the lower shelf) even though he doesn't look like it in this picture. He's so big! I love them both.


6 comments:

  1. I read it! I just don't always get to comment. You're a great mumma introvert or not!

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    1. Tenkyu tenkyu! As long as you can see the blog that's all that matters! ^^

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  2. I already know I am an introvert, but took the quiz anyway...confirmed:) Being introverted is not a negative label; everyone is different, and that's what makes the world go round. I am not shy about talking to people, but prefer being a homebody. I enjoy talking to you! I am sure Jesse does too, so let those "exploding" ideas of things to talk about be shared with him:) <3 XOXO!

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    1. I enjoy talking to you too! It's been obvious, I can talk with you for a long time whenever you visit us.

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  3. Awh, being an introvert doesn't make you a snob- don't worry! Snob is more like you don't talk to people because you think it's a waste of your time, and you feel like you're better than them. You're sweet, so you're free and clear of being anything snobbish. I looove that pic of the boys on the bookshelf, by the way. What cute brother buddies! (:

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