Mommy Musings

Your Body Is Not Ruined

2012-02-01T14:48:00.000-08:00

I am slowly getting my footing back on track again. C's been doing a great job not having any accidents throughout the day. Since yesterday, there have only been 2 #1 accidents and he hasn't peed on his bed. He always got up before he did "the job." So yes, I am proud of him. I hope it stays this way. I don't mind having to carry him on the toilet as long as he knows he needs to let us know when he needs to go.

Anyway, I was browsing Pinterest one day and I saw this quote from somebody's board:

"Your body is not ruined, you're a *%&@!# tiger who earned her stripes!"

Wow! That made me smile! Although I've already accepted a mother's body and figure (muffin tops, flabby belly, stretch marks...), sometimes I still wished that I could still fit into those pants and dress I used to wear when my husband and I were just dating. But reading that quote (whoever you are, thanks!) made me happy.

Another interesting read my visiting teacher posted on her Facebook wall today was this: Mommy Myths: Here's the Real Story. I like the whole article especially when she wrote:

Myth: I will have a tight tummy just like I did before I had children. No muffin top for me!

Truth: Unless you have a very unique set of awesome genes or you are a celebrity with unlimited access to plastic surgeons you better get comfortable with Mr. Muffin Top because he isn’t going anywhere. Saggy deflated balloon skin is also a friend that is here to stay.

I am thankful that I have 10 fingers and 10 toes, two eyes and ears, a mouth, a nose, hands, feet, legs, etc. I am thankful that my body - though it is no longer as "perfect" (in Hollywood's definition) as it used to be - it is complete, and that I could use it to fulfill my responsibilities as a wife, a mother, a daughter, a friend.

Big "This Too Shall Pass" Moments {Potty Training}

2012-01-30T11:16:00.000-08:00

I can't imagine how many times I've said that to myself my whole life - well, not really my whole life. It was ever since I left home and my family behind to go to school to a foreign country. The first big "this too shall pass" moments I had were each birthdays and Christmas every year for 7 years (and counting) that I was away from home. I had to tell myself that "this too shall pass" whenever I was homesick and wanted to be with my family. Of course, being homesick (especially during Christmas time) never gets old. But I could at least handle it fairly well and better now than I did before.

The second "this too shall pass" moments was the first several months of C's life. I've said "this too shall pass" so many times with regards to sleepless nights the first two months, painful nursing the first 6 weeks, and inconvenient breastfeeding the whole 15 months. When J was born, I had those exact same baby blue feelings I did with C (although nursing was easier with J) and had that 4-word phrase in my head every single minute of every single day. Because I know it's true - it shall pass. It was just temporary and I must stay positive no matter how exhausting it was.

The third is... potty training. Okay so this blog post is really just about whining with a tiny twist of trying to be positive. So last weekend, I faced the one thing I didn't want to face in my life (besides the first month of a newborn babe), and that is potty training. I miss my husband right now. I think my decision to start it on a weekend (instead of a weekday) was right because my husband was a BIG BIG BIG HELP to me. He was really good at staying positive and he keeps encouraging C no matter how many accidents we've had in the first morning alone.

Click image to see reviews from Amazon.com

I will spare you the details of his potty training, but C made a huge improvement on the first 6 hours of his first day of potty training. It's not really hard to train him. But I guess my "this too shall pass" moment is how hard it is right now because he can't get on the toilet on his own. And the many accidents (which I already expected) and constant washing of his sheets. And the fact that I have to keep an eye on him constantly while taking care of J. C's stupid toilet seat slides around and the pee guard is no use. We didn't know it was the worst consumer rated toilet seat until we checked it online (Amazon) on the first night of potty training C. I've thought many times to get him a potty seat where he can go on his own without our help because I know he will. He tries with his toilet seat but it's just hard for him to get on it, so I guess that's why he's not motivated enough to go by himself although he knows that that's what he needs to do. But then again, I thought it would be so much easier for all of us in the long run if he gets used to using the toilet right away and not have to transition him from a potty to a toilet.

Another thought I had was to slap some pull-ups on him during nap times and bedtimes. But again, I THINK (I am no expert, obviously, because this is my first time) it would only delay getting him fully potty trained. So for now I am sticking to our method and will just keep telling myself, "this too shall pass" even though I haven't had any good sleep since we started training him (J decided to wake up at 5 am since yesterday morning, especially if he rolled over). If only I had enough sleep, it would make the world so much better!

I know there are a lot harder challenges out there where this phrase, "this too shall pass" is more applicable. I admit, potty training him could be worse. But for right now, this is MY "this too shall pass" moment because I'm just a whiny person. One thing I would change in the future is to potty train J first before deciding to have another baby.

Sorry this post doesn't have a single picture in it, besides potty seat he has. I have a couple of photos in my camera but I'm just too lazy to upload it. Besides, C's right next to me watching his playlist in Youtube while I'm writing this so we can run to the toilet anytime he needs to go.

I Miss You

2012-01-20T11:20:00.000-08:00

Dear C,

You have been such a great 'kuya' to your little brother. You have ALWAYS been a good child to us, your parents. Thank you for your patience, your kindness, and your unconditional love. And for all the fun you've shared with us.

I am sorry if mommy can't give you the full attention that you used to have. Things will be different from now on, but know that mommy and daddy loves you just as much as we did before little J came along. We love both of you.

And mommy misses everything that we used to have when it was just you and me while daddy was at work. Most of all, I miss you. Please don't grow up too fast.

Love,
Mommy

Overwhelming...

2012-01-13T13:00:00.000-08:00

I have been pretty overwhelmed lately... just a little bit. As a stay-home mom, I feel like most of the pressure is on me to do these things because I'm the one who's constantly with our boys. Well, the things that overwhelms me lately are the thoughts of potty training, raising bilingual children, and starting our second child with solid foods.

I've put it off for a long time now but it's time to potty train our son. He's been a really good kid and was really easy to take care of ever since he was born but, of course, I haven't seen everything yet. Who knows how we will both handle potty training? But it has to be done... {sigh}. Just another sign that he's growing up and I can't stop it.

Second on the list is raising bilingual children. I did a pretty good job starting our first son with my language (Tagalog) when he was a baby. But ever since we left his birth place (and our friends who spoke my language), English automatically came out of my mouth whenever I talked to him. It was just weird for me to speak to him in Tagalog in a non-Tagalog speaking country.

But this year, I am trying really really HARD to talk to our sons in my language. My husband speaks it, too, but he thinks it's better if I am the MAIN one who speaks it to them because he's not sure if he was doing it good enough. Well.. I'm telling you, he's really good! No kidding! You can't tell that it's an American who's speaking Tagalog if you listen to him with your eyes closed. Seriously. (Don't blush, beb). I started this year good enough with regards to this bilingual thing. But at the beginning of each new day, English comes out of my mouth automatically. Then I revert back and forth to both languages the whole day (each time I spoke English automatically, I always continue to speak in Tagalog). It's frustrating because our first son only understands English (and I bet some Tagalog), and he's trying really hard to understand me when I speak to him in Tagalog. There are days that he's just not into it and he'll 'command' me to stop my Tagalog by being stern with his, "NO!" Well, at least I got to teach him to count 1 to 3 in Tagalog (he knows how to count 'til 20 in English). I just have to keep reminding myself to make it as fun as I can.

Another thing that's frustrating about that is that if I want to talk to him during potty training, I have to speak in English to take a little pressure off of both of us during the whole process. But I have to speak Tagalog exclusively to him if he were to learn the language (it's easiest to learn a new language when they're still young). Aah! What to do.

Grabbed from Google images

Third, starting solid foods. I don't mind it, really. I'm actually excited. Our second son is turning five months this month and it was about this age when we started his "kuya" (older brother) with rice cereal. The only thing that gets me overwhelmed thinking about it is the timing. Potty training a toddler while introducing solid foods to an infant requires lots and lots and LOTS of patience. I don't know how much I have in my patience bank.

Oh well... time to stock up on pair of hand gloves, disinfecting wipes/spray, and some big boy underwear!

FAILED!!!

2012-01-12T13:00:00.000-08:00

All of us fail. It's part of our human nature. And for one thing, we need it in order to gain experience. Here's a short clip that I really really love when I feel discouraged each time I failed:

And a few little quotes to bear in mind:

"The person who failed often knows how to avoid future failures.

The person who knows only success can be more oblivious to the pitfalls."

"Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted."

"It's not how hard you hit. It's how hard you get hit ... and keep moving forward."

- Randy Pausch, The Last Lecture

And a poem that I also posted with this exact same video and blog post a long time ago:

DON'T QUIT

(Unknown)

When things go wrong as they sometimes will,

When the road you're trudging seems all uphill

When the funds are low and the debts are high,

And you want to smile but you have to sigh,

When care is pressing you down a bit --

Rest if you must, but don't quit.

Life is strange with its twists and turns,

As everyone of us sometimes learns,

And many a fellow turns about

When he might have won had he stuck it out.

Don't give up though the pace seems slow --

You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than

It seems to a fair and faltering man,

Often the struggler has given up

When he might have captured the victor's cup,

And he learned too late when night came down

How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out --

The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,

And you never can tell how close you are,

It may be near when it seems afar,

So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit, --

It's when things seem worst that you mustn't quit.

PRODUCT REVIEW - THE Best High Chair We've Ever Had!

2012-01-11T08:27:00.000-08:00

Presenting... THE best high chair we've ever had:

Graco 4-in-1 Seating System.

Here's why we like it: IT'S A 4-in-1 SEATING SYSTEM!!! (Hehe!)

1. You can have it as a high chair:

2. Or a toddler booster:

Booster seat with and without the seat back.

3. Or infant feeding booster:

4. Or a youth chair (whatever that means). This is how our toddler is using it right now:

Youth chair without the seat back.

It has different height positions (I think 6) and 3 different recline levels:

I love the removable tray and that it's easy to pull-out and put back in. It's also dishwasher safe but I've always just hand washed it.

I don't know what that little table is for.. but we've always used the bigger one which snaps on top of the smaller one.

The "thing" where they lean on to (I don't know what it's called, sorry, my English is running out. For now I am calling it the "seat back"... hehehe!) is also adjustable and removable for both the toddler booster seat and the youth chair:

Adjustable seat back on booster seat

Adjustable seat back on youth chair.

It has a 5-point harness system too (which we never really used). We always just used the bottom harnesses, the ones that go on the waist:

I didn't take a picture of it but it has 4 wheels and the two back wheels have locks so your child won't roll off. I love how it's easy to clean. I just wipe it with Lysol wipes all the time and the dirt and grease comes off easily. The fabric material is machine washable, too.

This high chair was a little bit pricey when we looked at it (and bought it) at BabiesRUs last year, almost close to $200. But it was worth the price, what with our second child is now here who will start spoon feeding this month. Now we don't have to buy him his own infant seat. His "kuya" (older brother) can stay in his youth chair and we can use the infant seat to feed our baby, or he can have the high chair and his kuya can use the booster chair. So cool huh! Definitely a great item to have around the house!

Resolutions: Writing It Down

2012-01-09T15:16:00.000-08:00

I've never been good at New Year's Resolutions. I was still a young girl when I stopped making them because I couldn't keep them. It may also be because I never wrote them down where I can see them everyday.

But the page where I am in my book of life is different now. I have a husband and two wonderful little boys to take care of. So with that, I have to do my best every single day to be better in most things (if not in everything): Be a better person. A better wife. A better mother. A better friend. A better daughter of God.

So I wrote my resolutions down. Just a few of them so it won't be so overwhelming for me. Like they said, take one step at a time. I remember when I was in college, when you make goals (and/or resolutions), you have to write them down and as much as possible make them accurate or measurable. So I decided that do be a better person/wife/mother/friend./daughter, I have to write down at least five specific things I need to do to achieve that (for example, saying only positive things about people no matter how much I don't like them).

I don't know if I can keep up with my resolutions but I will do my best. It's for my own good - and my family's, too. I think the major thing I will work on this year to make me happier is to be more grateful and express it in words and actions. I will keep my resolutions to myself (actually my husband found them in my planner.. hehe!) but here are my goals for the year:

1. Finish reading the Book of Mormon again from cover-to-cover.
2. Keep my personal and blessings (or things I was thankful for for the day) journals updated daily.
3. Speak to my kids in TAGALOG everyday - yeah, like I never had that in my head more than twelve times a year.
4. Make two Christmas cards per month. This was probably my only goal last year and I wasn't able to do it.
5. Potty train our toddler.

Well, five goals is better than nothing, right? I hope I can keep them all. 'Til next time,

I Am Here

2012-01-05T14:02:00.000-08:00

Yes, I am.

I promise I'll be right back. I'm just way too busy right now.. well, at least until after this week - hopefully!

Heads up on my next posts (yes, they are saved as empty drafts):

* Resolutions & Goals- what? I have those?!?

* Product Review: THE best high chair we've ever had.

* FAILED - We all do
* Need Your Tips/Advice About ... {drum roll} POTTY TRAINING!!!

And some other random things that might pop up in my busy head. Seriously, it's like a very heavy conveyor belt that takes forever to stop completely even though I've told it many times to stop thinking. But for now, I will end this here and debate in my head whether to fold our clothes first or do some much needed paper craft... Maybe fold the clothes. Hehe!

Talk to you soon!

The Hair!!!

2011-12-22T15:42:00.000-08:00

So, last Sunday (and the previous Sundays whenever I wasn't too tired to go to church or if I wasn't confined in the mother's room), I had A LOT of comments about my son's hair. Two years ago, I had the same experience with our first. He had thick, black hair when he was a born (and he never EVER lose all of his hair) and everybody who saw him always mentioned "look at his hair! it's so gorgeous!"

Less than a month old

Then he grew up a few months older, and his hair a few curly lengths longer that we had to give him his first haircut at 10 months old...

His lei (from his dad) makes me miss Hawaii!

Oblivious at what's coming up. He was getting the haircut, not daddy.

Man, I can't believe that haircut was just early last year, 2010. It felt like ages ago.

Ta-da!

Actually I thought my husband was just going to ask the lady to cut off our son's bangs but then he told her to cut the whole thing and I was like, "HUH?!?" That night it felt like I was holding somebody else's baby. I was looking for the curls I used to touch whenever I nursed him. Hehehe.

So the same comments are being given to us now with our second son, "look at his hair! It's gorgeous!" but this time it wasn't "It's so curly" but rather, "it's standing up!" Yup, it's standing up... just like mommy's when she was a baby. He may not look like me anywhere else in his face (unlike his brother who got my eyes, at least. Oh! They both got my nose!!!), but he sure did get my "standing ovation" hairstyle!

Yeah, yeah, I was chubby.

3 months old

I don't know when he will need his first haircut but his hair is starting to curl up a little bit - not as much as his brother's was, though.

So, yes, like I said, some of the sisters in our ward took notice of his hair. One of them even said, "I love seeing his hair! It just makes you feel happy!" Haha! I didn't know hair can make you feel happy!

I think all of our children will be born with a lot of hair! Their dad had thick hair when he was a baby, and so did their mom. It'll be amazing if we have a baby who's almost bald.

What's Behind Their Smile

2011-12-18T10:16:00.000-08:00

Last night, my husband and I attended his company's Christmas party and there were some things I was reminded of - you can never tell someone's problems in life behind their smiles. So don't judge.

She says "Hi, how are you? You look great!" to me with a big smile. You can never tell that she's gone through divorce recently and in the middle of that she'd had a challenging pregnancy, and that her son had to go through surgery to fix his lungs when he was born. Another person my husband was particularly looking for was in the midst of a few crowd, laughing and smiling with them. Little did you know, her sister just died recently. You really cannot tell what a person is going through behind his/her smile.

My husband loves his work and enjoys working with his colleagues. Sometimes he shares with me some of his colleague's trials that they've shared with him. So last night, I was pretty amazed at how they could still smile despite what they've just gone through.

Note to Self - It's ... Staying In Love

2011-12-16T16:21:00.000-08:00

21 was my planned earliest age to get married when I was still just barely in 6th grade. When I was a teenager, I have always been wondering who among the guys I've met in my life (or will meet since then) will turn out to be my future spouse.

One day I turned 21 years old. Months passed when I became really down and depressed not because I couldn't find 'the one' but because of something else. I was in a different country, far away from my family and had no one to talk to so I sent an email to my mom telling her about my problem. A part of my email had these thoughts from my very young mind:

When I was young, maybe when I was 11, I used to think how much love it took for all parents in this world had to have before they married their spouse, how hard married life is, and how couples endured those hard times. I had no idea because I was young. But now, eventhough I don't have the complete idea yet, at least I have a few. When we marry, sacrifice will always be there (especially sacrificing your own pleasures and interests), selflessness and consideration, understanding, patience, appreciation, endurance, charity, meekness and humility, kind words and good communication, and most important is love... and keeping it alive no matter how much it would seem to die in the years that passes by. It's being in love and staying in love always, and keeping it that way til your hair turns gray and your skin becomes wrinkly and your sight blurs, no matter how much it wants to die out. Marriage is a team... efforts must be done together both by the couple with the aid of our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. "Neither is the man without the woman and neither is the woman without the man... in Christ". These are the few things I learned about marriage as years passed and as I prepared myself for it. It's not complete yet... but it's a fairly good amount of knowledge to start with. I know there will be more sooner or later.

I got married 11 months after I sent this email. I was glad I came across this just a few days ago. My innocent, younger self reminded me, even besides being single at the time, some things about marriage that I have to remember forever. And she was right - there were more things learned since then, and there will always be things to be learned as the years go by. I can honestly say that in our marriage, I'm the one who needs a lot of improvement. I love being married and I love my husband. I am so blessed with a loving husband. He loves me and he loves our children so much. We are not perfect at it but I can see that he's trying everyday to include our Savior in the center of our daily lives. And I admire him for that.

PRODUCT REVIEW - Dex Dura Bib & Munchkin Sprout Drying Rack

2011-12-13T11:07:00.000-08:00

I want to write a product review once in a while for a change. Some of the things we use have lasted for a while so that made me think of writing product reviews in my blog.

The first today is this bib:

Dex Dura bib (grabbed from Google images)

My son has these exact two bibs for more than a year and a half. We used to have a set of four bibs for very cheap - and the material were cheap, too. The print faded/came off within just a week. Plus, it was a wee bit too small.

These Dex Dura bibs, however, were big enough to grow with our son. The prints didn't come off. I love the "Catch-all" design (the pocket). The opening was wide enough to catch all the food, and the neckline was wide enough as well to protect the child's clothing. Another thing I liked about it is the option you have to remove the pocket by unsnapping the buttons.

(grabbed from Google images)

Our son liked seeing the printed animals on it, too. When he was finally aware of "Blues Clues," he used to always tell me that he found a clue on his dog bib. Haha!

It's sturdy because the bib wasn't made with just plastic all around, which had its ups and downs. The positive side to that is that it was really easy to clean - at least the front side of the bib where all the food drops. The only downside I saw was that the back side of the bib (the non-plastic material) was hard to wash, thus some mold tend to form on it. But other than that, we loved these bibs.

Second on the list (images grabbed from Amazon.com):

Munchkin Sprout Drying Rack

I love, love, LOOOOVE this drying rack! It's been my first (and so far the last) drying rack, ever. It's been with us for a long time but it's still holding up great. I took it with us whenever we drove up to California to be with my in-laws. And it never broke on my luggage. It holds a lot of bottles and its accessories. I have the Playtex VentAire bottles so this rack was even more perfect. What I did was that the bottles go to the bigger "branches" of the rack, and then the accessories with holes go through the smaller branches (with the bottle nipple on top of it, just like the picture above), and the base accessories of the bottles (the ones without the holes, the vent part) go on the base of the rack. The rack held so much more stuff that way. I put the bottle brush on the cup of the rack.

I like how it catches all the water that was dripping from the bottles when they've just been washed and trap it inside (some racks can't do that). It also rotates, so you can grab things pretty easily. It's easy to assemble as well as to disassemble (for storing and/or cleaning it). If you're looking for a bottle rack, this is the one!

Note to Self - A Father's Faith

2011-12-11T16:31:00.001-08:00

It's been quite a few months (after our second baby was born) since hubby and I were able to watch a movie at home after the kids went to bed. Some of our (or MY) reasons were I was too tired, our second baby was still too young (and still woke up a lot of times during the night and we needed to get as much sleep as we could), and hubby was studying for his CPA exam. Well, now that both kids are sleeping through the night, hubby's taking a few days' break from studying, and even though I am still always tired at the end of the day, we can now watch a movie or at least an episode of a TV show after the kids had gone to bed. Last night, hubby and I watched this:

(Life in A Day)

Here's a synopsis from Netflix about this movie:

"After thousands of people around the world joined together to record banal and remarkable everyday events on July 24, 2010, director Kevin MacDonald led a team of editors to condense more than 4,500 hours of video into this picture of life on Earth."

We both got curious about it so we watched it. I liked it. It was pretty much like the "Babies" that came out last year. There was one scene, though, that got stuck in my head. It's about a widower and father who lives in a cemetery with his kids. I don't know where they're from and we only read the subtitles from what he said.

His 20 year-old son (the eldest of the children) is mentally retarded and the father couldn't go out to work because nobody else is going to watch after his children (living in a cemetery and all). Fourteen people live in their little place where they have no electricity, no water, no drainage. You can see the mud all over the place and even all over the childrens' body and clothing. Flies are everywhere. My heart broke when I saw a baby peacefully sleeping despite their condition. Then at the end of that short clip, the father said this:

"... But we are still alive. God will not forget us. He created us. That is what I believe. God wouldn't have created all these population just to forget us."

What a tremendous faith! Despite their condition, he still had great faith in God. It was a perfect reminder for me that no matter how many people are in this world, He knows each of them and is mindful of them. He is mindful of me and my family, no matter what circumstances we may encounter now or in the future. I have to remember that.

He said in Moses 1:37:

my favorite CHRISTmas song

2011-12-08T07:40:00.001-08:00

It's that time of the year when it's considered "legal" (figuratively) to play Christmas songs. It's all over the place - radio stations, shopping malls, TV commercials/shows, etc. I love it because I love the spirit these songs bring about Christmas, especially if those songs are indeed about our Savior (not Santa. Gosh, I hate "Santa Baby")

My husband and I have the same favorite Christmas song (well, at least he said so just recently). It's been my favorite since I was a little girl, maybe because I liked the melody even though I didn't understand much of the lyrics back then. The melody is so powerful, it always gives me the goosebumps.

Then one day, while we were visiting my relatives in California during the holidays (and attended their ward at church), this young man sang my favorite song. Only, I didn't know the COMPLETE lyrics before then. So when I heard him sing it with parts of the lyrics I've never heard before, I almost bawled. He sang it so well and so powerful and meaningful, I totally felt the message of the song. Before that day, I didn't pay so much attention to the song even though it was my favorite because I heard it all the time. But ever since that day, I always, ALWAYS stop and listen to the song and relish the whole meaning of it as it plays on our computer/radio.

I've attached a video below to go along with the song although it's not really the whole song in it. I'm having a hard time finding someone on Youtube with a complete lyrics of this song. As you read the lyrics & listen to the video, try not to overlook the message of the song no matter how very familiar it already is for you. I was actually singing it in my head as I was typing it here and I got the goosebumps again. The message is sweet.

(John Sullivan Dwight's Version)

O holy night! The stars are brightly shining,

It is the night of our dear Saviour's birth.

Long lay the world in sin and error pining,

'Til He appear'd and the soul felt its worth.

A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,

For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.

Fall on your knees! O hear the angels' voices!

O night divine, O night when Christ was born;

O night divine, O night, O night Divine.

Led by the light of Faith serenely beaming,

With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.

So led by light of a star sweetly gleaming,

Here come the wise men from Orient land.

The King of Kings lay thus in lowly manger;

In all our trials born to be our friend.

He knows our need, to our weakness is no stranger,

Behold your King! Before Him lowly bend!

Behold your King, Before Him lowly bend!

Truly He taught us to love one another;

His law is love and His gospel is peace.

Chains shall He break for the slave is our brother;

And in His name all oppression shall cease.

Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,

Let all within us praise His holy name.

Christ is the Lord! O praise His Name forever,

His power and glory evermore proclaim.

The Magic of Christmas...

2011-12-02T14:46:00.001-08:00

Guess what! WE ARE FINALLY DECORATING FOR CHRISTMAS THIS YEAR!!!!!!

Yep! You got that right! We.are.decorating our house!!! For the first time in three years! We also bought our first Christmas tree.

setting up our first Christmas tree

It's actually my very first Christmas tree my whole life since my family and I always used a makeshift one. I will put up another picture once it's all decorated with ornaments (which won't be a lot - we're going to build up our number of ornaments as the year goes by). It's a big tree, we're actually gonna have to rearrange our furniture. I've also put up our handful of Christmas decor - a nativity, stockings, coasters, and 2 ornaments. It's not much but it's a start.

My sister-in-law made us a big decorative tile a few years ago with words from Luke 2:11: "For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Chris the Lord." I still have to get a plate easel for it to stand next to our nativity. But there is another thing I want to add next to our nativity though (opposite the Luke 2:11 frame):

I found it from Pinterest and I love the message. It'll be perfect next to our nativity and it matches the other tile that my sister-in-law gave us. I would love our kids to see this all the time so each of us will be reminded that Christmas is not about the presents but about the birth of our Savior.

There are several Christmas songs that remind me most of the Christmas I knew when I was growing up. The top 2 for me are:

Carnie & Wendy Wilson's whole "Hey Santa" album

Ryan Cayabyab's album

The lantern in the beginning of the video (Ryan Cayabyab's) is actually the specialty in my hometown. I remember going home from school (an hour jeepney ride) watching these beauties in the streets, their lights dancing in the dark. They're beautiful.

Thankful for Dirty Dishes

2011-11-22T20:00:00.000-08:00

It's not my least favorite thing to do (actually it's a little therapeutic for me) but here's the reason why I'm thankful for our dirty dishes, piles of laundry, dirty house, etc: a post from "An Old Fashioned Girl"

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

If Only I Was An Octopus

2011-11-16T16:31:00.001-08:00

This is just very random but I just want to share this. C has been an awesome "kuya" (big brother) ever since we had his little brother. He's never shown any jealousy and he never hurts his little brother on purpose. But one thing changed, well maybe a couple.

I used to be able to leave him in one room when I need to get something done. But now if I am not within his sight, you will hear a slow wailing sound building up from him (like a low ambulance siren) as he utters the words "I"... and then followed by "want Mommy!" Even telling him that "I'm right here" is no longer enough. HE NEEDS TO SEE ME!

After naps is a bit of the same story - depending on who wakes up first. C has always been content, since he was a baby, to cuddle with me after he wakes up from his nap/sleep. It's still the same way now. But what's tough is when his little brother wakes up first in their nap, crying. I'll go take J and cradle him, and then next thing you'll hear from the other bedroom is, "Iiiiii want Mommy!!! I want mommy! I want mommy!" C will get up and check us out. I tell him to come over but he won't. It's like, "I want you and you alone, mom! Let's cuddle in your bed - just you and I" thing. There was actually one time I was carrying both of them in each arm. Boy my arms were sore! If only I was an octopus... :P

Note to Self - It Is What God Gave You Time For

2011-11-13T22:18:00.000-08:00

There are so many things I want to do but I 'chose' not to because I have other priorities - our kids. But there are days that I sometimes wish I could just disappear and do everything I want (my hobbies mostly). Of course, I am thankful for our sons but I guess I can say it's also just human for me to sometimes wish that I can spend a lot of time for myself - to read books, to scrapbook, to go to places (w/o kids in tow), etc.

Tonight my husband read something to us (yes, including our two sons) as we all just "hung-out" in our bedroom - actually ON our queen size memory foam bed. It was a talk given by Elder Neil L. Andersen on last month's General Conference. There was one paragraph that really hit home to me. He said:

Many voices in the world today marginalize the importance of having children or suggest delaying or limiting children in a family. My daughters recently referred me to a blog written by a Christian mother [not of our faith] with five children. She commented: "[Growing] up in this culture, it is very hard to get a biblical perspective on motherhood. ... Children rank way below college. Below world travel for sure. Below the ability to go out at night at your leisure. Below honing your body at the gym. Below any job you may have or hope to get." She then adds: "Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling. You do not collect children because you find them cuter than stamps. It is not something to do if you can squeeze time in. It is what God gave you time for."

Well, that being said, I felt guilty right away and thankful (for that message) at the same time. She (whoever she is) is right: motherhood is a calling. Never mind my hobby to make greeting cards or read books. My calling is with my family. We (my husband and I) are raising God's children and He entrusted us to meet their needs physically, emotionally, and spiritually (with His help). It is indeed a divine calling. My family is what God gave me time for. I have to remember that.

Side note: I love stamps but children are definitely CUTER than stamps. Hehe!

Lullabies

2011-11-11T15:55:00.000-08:00

What it was SOMETIMES like whenever I tried to put J down for a nap:

Me: "Hmmm..hmm..hmmm..." (humming to Rock-a-bye Baby while rocking the baby)
J: (looks puzzled, then...) "Waaaa!!!"

Me: (change of song - Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star) "Mm mm.. Mm mm.. Mmm mmm mmm.."

J: (even louder) "WAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!"

Me: (Brahm's lullaby) "Mmm mm mmm... Mmm mmm mmm.."

J: (shrieks) "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

C (jumping in the background): "Mommy listen to me!"

Me: "All right, J." (I let him go and let the computer sing the songs for him)

J: (nods off to lalala land in a few minutes)

I'm glad those days are over. NO, I don't hum lullabies to him anymore. He always gets mad at me whenever I tried. My husband thinks it's funny. I get the point - I can't sing. Ha! Oh poor mommy! Hahaha!!! Well, at least I had my chance when C was the baby - he loved it. I still want our old Mac back, though, so I can upload some photos. By the way, it was a great night last night. Our 2 1/2 months old slept from 9pm-6:30am. WOOHOOO!!!!

Note to Self - Babies Don't Keep

2011-11-08T13:22:00.000-08:00

I loved the lesson given by our Relief Society President at our Relief Society class last Sunday. It was very timely for me. In summary, we were reminded that our children are what's important, not our things that we have or that we need to get done. Sometimes I tend to worry so much about keeping our house clean and organized. She shared a poem to one of the sisters and I asked our RS President to email it to me too... as a note to myself...

Cooking and cleaning can wait 'till tomorrow,
For babies grow up,
We've learned to our sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs,
Dust go to sleep,
I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.

Here's the whole poem (not sure if it's the original) from my searches on the Web:

Song for a Fifth Child
by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton

Mother, oh Mother, come shake out your cloth
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth
Hang out the washing and butter the bread,
Sew on a button and make up a bed.
Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She's up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I've grown shiftless as Little Boy Blue
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo)
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due,
(pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo)
The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew
And out in the yard there's a hullabaloo
But I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
Look! Aren't her eyes the most wonderful hue?
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo)

The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow
For children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.

"Hey Jimmy Kimmel, I Told My KidsI Ate All Their Halloween Candy"

2011-11-07T15:42:00.000-08:00

A lot of people have posted this and I keep skipping it. Well, since both of my kids were down for their nap kind of late today (thank you DST!.. not), I checked this one out. It made me laugh, especially the first several ones. Poor kids...

I wonder if this would've worked with C. He's probably just gonna say, "all gone!"

Doing the Dishes

2011-11-07T15:18:00.000-08:00

I saw this from my friend's Facebook wall and it made me think of Caleb 8 years from now (of course, I will be the one behind the camera) when he does the dishes. He loves dancing to Michael Jackson's "Smooth Criminal" (except when somebody else is watching other than mommy) right now so who knows.. hahaha! This video made me smile.

Bullying

2011-11-04T14:04:00.000-07:00

Found this from my Facebook friend. I thought it was great and I just had to post it here.

"A teacher in New York was teaching her class about bullying and gave them the following exercise to perform. She had the children take a piece of paper and told them to crumple it up, stomp on it, and really mess it up but do not rip it. Then she had them unfold the paper, smooth it out, and look at how scarred and dirty it was. She then told them to tell it they're sorry. Now even though they said they were sorry and tried to fix the paper, she pointed out all the scars they left behind. And that those scars will never go away no matter how hard they tried to fix it. That is what happens when a child bullies another child. They may say they're sorry but the scars are there forever. The looks on the faces of the children in the classroom told her the message hit home."

Pacifier or Thumb?

2011-11-03T14:18:00.000-07:00

J is slowly figuring out how to put his fist in his mouth - the left one in particular. He tries to put it in his mouth with each bath and each diaper change, and sometimes when he's just "chilling" in his swing. He'll even try to extend his thumb - but he's always unsuccessful... for now.

When I first saw C do it two years ago, I thought it was cute. I also liked how we were all able to sleep through the night. Josh still wakes up once or twice each night even though by this time C could sleep through the night because he'd already found his thumb. But, like I said, Josh is slowly figuring out how to suck his thumb. In the past few weeks, it sounded like a good idea - to let him suck his thumb. Then maybe we could get some good sleep at night. But it wasn't until today, while I was browsing through the Web for photos to use in this post, that I am convinced not to let him. For one, I don't want him to have oral problems that could also affect his speech. C's teeth right now are slowly becoming the "thumb sucker's teeth," kind of like this one:

grabbed from Google images

I found this picture from Google owned by a mom blogger like me. This was her daughter's teeth before she got her braces. Her daughter was an avid thumb sucker.

Anyway, C is slowly having the same problem (we haven't taken him to the dentist ever). I don't want him to wear braces (though he might have to seeing that his teeth are slowly growing inwards and not straight up, I don't know). This is just my opinion, but I am still somehow convinced that for some instances where a kid needs braces, it is related to his habit of sucking his thumb. So, right now for me thumb sucking for Josh is thrown out of the window. But how can we get a good night's sleep? Option no. 2: THE PACIFIER!

grabbed from IMDb

NO! Not that pacifier! This pacifier...

grabbed from Google images

This is a good option. For one, it's easier (I think, not sure) to wean a baby/toddler off of their binkies than their thumbs because you can take it away. With a thumb, you have to come up with something more clever than a "binky fairy." The only thing I don't like about it is, first, that it'll keep getting lost (unless you have a strap) and you'll always have to "upgrade" to a bigger size. Second, at Josh's stage right now, we have to keep putting it back in his mouth whenever he's looking for it. Third, we can't forget to bring it along whenever we're out and about or else it's going to be the end of the world (maybe).

It makes me think, "is it really that necessary?" My siblings and I (all seven of us) were raised without the use of a pacifier or letting us suck or thumbs. Most babies and toddlers back in my home country don't use pacifiers and most don't suck their thumbs. There are also some children here in the U.S. who got by without sucking their thumbs or using a pacifier. So IT IS POSSIBLE for a baby or a toddler not to use a pacifier or suck a thumb.

I think it's not just the child who gets attached to their pacifier/thumb but also their parent(s), based from my own experience as a parent. I've also read some on random blogs of parents a long time ago (when C was a baby) who admitted that they were also attached to their child's pacifier use/thumb sucking and it was just as hard for them to wean their baby off the pacifier/thumb as it was for their baby who was getting weaned. This attachment definitely started from something - from letting the kids use it in the first place. Now that we have a thumb sucker, and one who is learning how to thumb suck and is in-between pacifier use and thumb sucking, I think that in order to avoid the "attachment," I should just not start it in the first place. But how?

Do you have a proven, working method (or books) to avoid pacifier use or thumb sucking (and how to stop thumb sucking)? Please share it. I really really want to know. I am not against the use of pacifiers or thumb sucking nor am I attacking any parent who are using/have used these to their child(ren). We've all been there. We all know, when baby's happy, everybody's happy! But, as for myself, I am honestly slowly becoming reluctant to using any of these forms to soothe my child. It's just me. I keep wondering if my siblings and I, and most babies and toddlers I've seen back home (and some here in the U.S.) could get by without a pacifier or a thumb, why can't my children? I really don't want Josh to grow up with a pacifier or a thumb plugged in his mouth. But in all honesty, I am still not sure if I can do this because I don't know how but I'd like to try. Then again, maybe someday you'll see me and say, "Hey! Josh is sucking his thumb/pacifier!" because I might put his pacifier in his mouth sometime today ... haha! I am still torn between thumb sucking and pacifiers, but I really think I'd rather have him in a pacifier than his thumb if I can't do it without any of these two. IF I do stick with the pacifier, though, let's hope I can wean him off before he turns 1. Well, it'll be the same hope (weaning before 1 y.o.) if he turns out to be a thumb sucker.

What I Can Change

2011-11-01T14:54:00.000-07:00

I am telling you right now, this is probably the most honest, true-to-my-own-life post I've ever written. [Deep sigh] here goes...

Life as a stay-home mom with a toddler and a newborn and with only one car is like a love/hate relationship to me. Love because I love being a mother and I love our boys so much! Hate because I just barely had the freedom to drive around and get out, and now I find myself stuck at home again. Sure I can walk around the block with our kids, but I think I'd rather take them to the park where I can just hold our newborn and let my toddler run and play around the slides as freely as he wants to than to walk around the block and keep telling him to "watch out! there's a car!" while pushing his little brother in the stroller.

Each morning/dawn, it feels like I don't want to get up and start the day. It feels like I want this:

... if only it was possible. Okay, buckle up for the complaints...

(1) Sometimes I just want a huge break from everything. But seeing that I'm the only one here with no family or close friends nearby (except for the Brenemans), it's hard to find that break. It's a good thing that right now I got that break (thus, this blog) but most of the time it's hard to get that break. Sometimes being home alone with the kids makes me feel lonely.

(2) I find myself wishing most of the time that our newborn is crawling now and sitting up. It's like I can't wait for him to grow up so our toddler can play with him and we can go out more. I think one major thing that makes me feel that way is because

(3) I want to get done with breastfeeding. I nursed our first son until he was 15 months old and it was only after then that I had real fun going out because he wasn't depending on my physical body anymore for his milk. Seriously, travelling while your kid is breastfeeding is not as convenient to some mothers like me as it is to others (even though some may argue otherwise). When we had our first son, I hated looking for a bathroom to nurse when we ate out for dinner, or when I nursed in our car multiple times while sweating all over my body because our first son DID NOT want to breastfeed with a nursing cover on and he wasn't taking a bottle (even with my expressed milk). It was really inconvenient whenever we traveled. I want to be done with breastfeeding because then I won't have to do those things anymore when we're out and about, I will be able to sleep better and actually sleep on my side, and I can get rid of these annoying breast pads. That thinking is very selfish of me, though.

There are so many things I think about everyday that I wish I could do right now, like going back to reading books without being interrupted, or crafting, or cleaning the house/taking a shower/eating without needing to hurry up because the baby will be waking up soon. Sometimes thinking about these things make me sad and get depressed. But there is one thing that got stuck with me at church last Sunday when our Bishop's former first counselor gave his talk. He talked about his Facebook friend who posted (I'm paraphrasing), "some people will never change" and then he replied, "that might be true but what we can change is how we perceive that person." I think I can put that philosophy in my own life right now... there are things I can't change - being stuck in the house, not being able to take a break most of the time, figuring out how to give equal attention to two kids simultaneously, our newborn being a newborn still, etc. But what I can change is how I react/face these things - being thankful that we have a house, being thankful that we have children who add joy to our lives (as well as tired bodies.. hehe), being thankful that our firstborn is understanding and loves his little brother and was never jealous, taking in every sweet smile and little chuckles that our baby makes because HE WILL grow up sooner than I thought, and just knowing that through breastfeeding I am giving our newborn the best food for him right now ... and many other positive things I can put in my mind.

I know it will not be as easy as it sounds at some days. Of course, there will be bad days (like when I was really hungry but I was holding our crying newborn who just barely ate while watching our toddler have his lunch) as well as good days (such as today). But I can try to be more positive. I think it's my husband who told me this (who probably heard/read it somewhere), "Are you a cup half-full or half-empty?" Then I said I want to be the "half-full." He then replied, "I'm just grateful there's a cup."

Yes, I know someday it'll be better. I'll be having so much fun with my sons sooner than I thought, no matter where we are - indoors or out.

P.S. Before I started this blog (after my quick shower), our newborn was starting to wake up after only half an hour of taking a snooze. He is learning to put his thumb in his mouth and I guess that wakes him up. I was so tired so I prayed for a break... and our Father did give me a break long enough to finish this post. Our newborn fell asleep again on his own, and our toddler remained sleeping without a peep. He hears and He listens.

Malachi 3:10

2011-10-19T22:13:00.000-07:00

Malachi 3:10

Growing up, I always had faith and testimony in the power of paying tithes. I always knew that I have to pay my tithes because I already owed so much to our Father in Heaven and yet He still blesses me with the things He knows I will need in this life.

That testimony grew stronger when I was studying in BYU-Hawaii. I was an international student who didn't make much money but was blessed with scholarships that made it possible for me to pay for my studies. I had the IWES scholarship until before my last semester and last term. The IWES scholarship was good enough to get me through some things that were needed to be paid for in school. But that and my little income was not enough to help me pay for my "family contribution," buy my books for my classes, and to buy my other necessities like toiletries. I did my best to pay an honest tithing. I studied hard and then towards or before my last year and a half (I think) in school, I was able to apply for two different private scholarships. Those scholarships covered my expenses for my books and my family contribution. I was indeed blessed.

More than 3 years had passed since I graduated and I still have a strong testimony about paying an honest tithing. My husband and I have tried our best to be full-tithe payers. It is really a test of faith. Blessings, financial and not, have come through paying our tithes. For example, Jesse received two consecutive promotions from his work two months ago although he's only been there for a year. Now, I know it was partly because of his performance as an employee. But I firmly believe it also had something to do with paying our tithing. His promotions led us to have a little bit more income which we really needed because we were having another child and were moving to another (more expensive) place. His promotions came just at the right time that we needed it.

It wasn't only through financial things that we've been blessed. In his April 1982 General Conference talk, President Hinckley said, "... I am not here to say that if you pay an honest tithing you will realize your dream of a fine house, a Rolls Royce, and a condominium in Hawaii. The Lord will open the windows of heaven according to our need, and not according to our greed..." I know that to be true. Although we are a one-income family, Jesse was always able to find a job to sustain our family and I was always able to stay home with our children. We are all in good health. We have the gospel. We have two beautiful children whom we love so much! We are married in the Temple, the house of the Lord. We have our basic needs - food, shelter, and clothing. And the list can go on.

Bottom line is, I know that blessings come in the form that we NEED (not 'want') when we pay an honest tithing. The Lord has promised us in Malachi that He will bless us when we pay our tithing - and He will fulfill His promise when we do our part.

Wordpress post

2011-10-07T14:49:00.000-07:00

I have another post on our public family blog on Wordpress. Click this link. Enjoy reading!

Life's Changes...

2011-08-16T15:09:00.000-07:00

Several weeks ago, Parents.com asked their Facebook fans about the ways their lives changed when they had their baby. I've always meant to post a blog about it, too, even though I've answered their question as well but I never really had the time to do so.

Today, they finally posted those responses on their website called, "Readers Reveal: Surprising Ways Life Changes When You Become a Parent." I would like to echo some of their responses here and my own insights:

* A New Respect for Mom - it is true. When I became a mother, I have always wondered about how my mother (and my mother-in-law) did certain things that I took for granted as a kid. For example, I am not a big fan of going out for long hours with a baby. I sometimes wondered how my parents took us out as a whole family (of 7 kids) on Saturdays? We didn't have our own car so that's even harder, I guess?

* You See the Big Picture - I am both living in the present and for the future. Everything that my husband and I do right now as a couple has always been for our family both in the present time and in the future but it was magnified when we both became parents. The things that we do are for our small family no matter what those are - the things we teach them, the money we save for them, the relationship we build with them, and many more - they are all for the present time and also for the future.

* Baby Makes Your Day - I am a stay-home mom and even though I always see our son, it still ALWAYS makes my day whenever I see him laugh, smile, play, be silly, etc. I know it makes his dad's day even much better whenever he comes home from work. Sometimes I am having a tough time, and our son's little touch on my face with his round eyes right in front of mine (especially whenever he smiles his big smile) were enough to cheer me up.

* A New Timeline - this one I am not a big fan of. To be honest, this is one of the things I am not looking forward to when we have baby #2. I just don't like going out with a baby, or preparing to go somewhere and worrying about how I still have to do this or that before you can head out the door. With our first son, I didn't like how I was always worried that he would "starve to death" whenever we were out and about because he would NEVER take a bottle from me (or his daddy) and he wouldn't nurse with a nursing cover either unless we are hiding inside the car, the public restroom, or our bedroom. I always had to estimate what time we had to be out of the door and the time we have to get back before the world (at least my world) will come to an end. But you gotta do what you gotta do most of the time. I'm sure I will have another "timeline" once our baby is born.

* Personal Time - this entry from the website made me laugh. Anyway, it is true though. For the longest time, I couldn't go to the bathroom on my own without our little one following me around. It's gotten better now, though. Also, yes, I missed a lot of showers. I never thought that it's true - SHOWER is not a luxury mothers can have. If they ever have the time to shower, it needs to be really fast (unless they have somebody else watching their kiddos for them). I even stopped reading books for myself now, and was switched to reading Dr. Seuss or Thomas the Tank Engine.

* A New Perspective - one of my favorites. As an adult, there are many things I take for granted in life. Our little buddy is a good "reminder" for me to appreciate the simple things in life that I mostly take for granted. There was one afternoon when Caleb saw a colony of ants "walking" on our wall. They were really tiny. Yet he saw them and was in ultimate AWE of them. He spent more than half an hour just watching them crawl and trying to get them to crawl on his arms (which he ended up smashing by accident). It was the cutest thing.

* Healthier Diet - yes, from the day we found out that I'm pregnant with our first, we became more conscious about what we eat. Sometimes I would sneak some ice cream here and there but most of the time, I obey my husband's "eat whole wheat bread instead of white" mindset. Now that our little one is a toddler, we still try to give him healthy meals and snacks. When I was single, I ate whatever I wanted to eat. Hahaha!

* Your Spouse is More Important - life changes when you have a baby, even your marriage. Whether it turns towards the bad side or the good side, it's up to the couple. My husband has always been more important to me even before we had our children. I always rely on him, as well. I love seeing him develop both as a husband first and then a father everyday.

* No Sleep, No Problem - I was really amazed how possible it can really be. For the first 2 months when our first child was born (I know I'm lucky), I was the one with the most "awake" hours than anybody else in our little family. But I was amazed how I could still go through the day no matter how much lack of sleep I had.

* Movie Makeover - besides what they said on the website that you watch the same movie "50 times a day," I would add that our Netflix queue (or whatever movie we watch) is filled up with animated cartoons. If we weren't watching anything from Netflix (say going out to the theaters), we always picked the one that was "child appropriate" even though we wanted to watch something else.

* Who's Looking After Mom - one of my least favorite is getting sick and there's nobody to take care of me but I still have to take care of our son, do chores, etc. I still had to get up no matter how badly I wanted to stay in bed.

* All About Baby - it sums it all. It's not just about me anymore. I don't care about myself anymore. Of course, my husband still comes first. But after him, it's all about our baby - our children. Everything I do everyday is for all of them... no matter how tired I was, or how bad my day is going. When I'm tired (especially now that I am 39 weeks pregnant), I push myself to keep moving, to try to keep playing and spending time with our little one, and preparing for our second baby. I watch everything I do and say, and at least try to do my best to be a good example to them (though I still have A LOT of room for improvement). It's amazing how much love parents can have for their children. I love them so much, it is overflowing inside me. It always makes me realize how wonderful it is to know that if I could love a child this much, our Heavenly Father loves us so much more - and it is such a good feeling to know that His love is more perfect than what I have.

39...

2011-08-11T14:21:00.000-07:00

I haven't updated this blog for a while. I haven't had the time to blog lately because I usually used my son's nap time (the time I usually use to blog) to take a short nap as well.

Well, I had my second to the last appointment last Tuesday, the 9th. My doctor said I'm already at 3 cm. She thinks my labor/delivery will be quick. I hope so. She also thinks this baby will be smaller than Caleb so we'll see. I guessed otherwise.

We're basically pretty much settled down now in our new home. Although I'm pretty sure a house is harder to clean than an apartment, I'm still glad we're done with apartment living. It's our first time to live in a house since we got married.. and it's so good. We just need a few more items for our little one before his birth, and a little bit of cleaning here and there then we're good to go.

When I was pregnant with our first baby, the last week seemed the longest wait for me. This time around, the last 2 weeks seemed too long. Maybe it's because I still had 5 weeks left in my pregnancy when my doctor told me I was 2.5 cm. dilated. I really hope I can go into labor sometime before next Saturday (the 20th) so that I can have my doctor deliver our baby (she'll be gone during the week I am due). But first, I need to finish packing up our hospital bag.. haha! I'll be 39 weeks this weekend.

Toddler Bed

2011-07-12T11:16:00.000-07:00

My days of good night's rest has ended 2 months earlier than my anticipated time (new baby's first week)... it was when we switched C from this:

... to this:

He loves his new big boy bed - and also the freedom that came with it - freedom to get out of his room AS MANY TIMES AS HE WANTS whenever he wants to, even if it is at 3 in the morning (or earlier). I like that he likes his bed - but I don't like the fact that he can get out now whenever he wants to.

He won't really cry whenever he woke up in the middle of the night, though. He'll just silently walk up to my side of our bed, pat me gently on my back (or touch my cheeks) 'til I wake up and wait for me to go back with him in his room to put him back to bed. Then I'll go back to our room, and a few minutes later he's back again. Sometime's he'll stop doing it after a while but I am just so tired to keep doing it that I resort to lying down next to his bed. We have a foldable cushion/mattress (whatever that was called) lying on the floor next to his bed for whenever I need to stay with him in the middle of the night. It isn't the most comfortable place to sleep in for me right now but at least I won't have to get up and walk back and forth in the middle of the night for the whole night. At least with the cushion, I can just reach out my hands to C whenever he wakes up and he'll go back to sleep.

We've thought about putting him back in his crib (and I'm still thinking about it) but I just don't want to go back there and start on the toddler bed someday all over again - especially on the days that we have our newborn. That will be tougher than now, so I want to get him used to it now. Me staying with him for a while (and then leaving him alone after a few weeks or so) always worked when he was getting used to his crib, so I hope it will still work with his big boy bed.

Well... I am glad to say I think I've found the trick to it! When he was using his crib, he didn't mind his door being shut or at least he didn't say so or act like it. Last night, he cried (for the first time) each time I closed the door - 'til I left it open and let some light in. He stayed there the whole night 'til 5:45am this morning (an improvement, actually). I'm currently doing it right now again for his nap (the door's wide open) and he hasn't gone out yet. I can't say yet if this trick works because he normally stays in his bed for naps 'til he falls asleep, but not for bed time. So we'll see tonight. Wish me luck! If you have any suggestions to share, please feel free to let me know! :)

Nothing is Too Big or Too Small to Ask About...

2011-07-10T22:29:00.000-07:00

"You can go on ahead without me..." was the text message I read from Jesse today after church. He was doing some tithing stuff with our bishop's counselor today and he told me I can go home without him. I was actually excited to be able to do it all on my own even though I've driven that route (to and from our church) before for most Sundays that have passed.

Most of you know that I passed my driver's test yesterday. After almost 26 years, I finally have my own driver's license - not a permit, but a LICENSE! I don't know how and I'm not sure but maybe for most Americans, that age is a little bit late to get a driver's license than majority of them do. See, back home (Philippines), we could get by without having our own car. There are TONS of public transportations everywhere. If I still lived there, I probably still don't know how to drive a car.

Having my license now, as what most of my Facebook friends (and relatives) said, is liberating - a FREEDOM! For me it was more like freedom to go out whenever I 'need' to without counting on somebody else to take us (C and I) out. I have about just had enough of being stuck inside our house no matter how much I wanted to take C out to the park (which is really close by if you drive but a torture for a pregnant lady like me to walk to) - and I am really excited to be able to take him out there now on our own, or to go grocery shopping on my own (which I finally did yesterday, too) and do all the "housewifey errands" that most housewives can do because they can drive alone. I love and am looking forward to be able to do those, especially now that Jesse is getting busier studying for his CPA exam this month.

I cannot let this post end without giving credit to those who helped me. For one, it's Jesse and his extreme patience to me whenever we went out to drive. His first time to teach me was in Hawai'i and we had a manual transmission car. It was fun then for me but it became nerve-wracking when we had C so I stopped practicing 'til we moved here in Vegas - and I always lost my cool whenever we went out to drive. Yes, I always scolded him even though it's mostly my fault. But he always remained calm and loving. The last practices we had this last week were challenging for him because I was really uncomfortable (belly-wise) so I always got irritated quickly. But he was always patient with me.

Second is Jim from Silver State Driving Academy. After failing my first driver's test here in Las Vegas (2nd time to take the test, my first time was in Hawai'i), I really wanted to try taking a driving school session. Finally after weeks of asking, Jesse gave in and found Silver State (one of the cheapest). They teach you and charge you every session (2 hours each) and then determine if you need some more sessions to take. Well, Jim basically taught me everything I already knew when we went out driving. But what he gave me is the confidence I needed - confidence in myself that I can do it. I had this huge fear of driving on my own with the examiner for my second test but Jim took that fear away. He made me feel confident about myself and my driving skills. He actually said I was good to go and wondered why I even took that driving session with him. I said I am scared of being tested at parallel parking (which is always the reason why I didn't pass the first two tests). So he offered to teach me just that on my next session before my test. Unfortunately I never went back to them because they didn't even have ANY records of me - let alone taking a class with them before. Jesse taught me well about parallel parking last week for 2 days (probably 15 minutes each day) and I am happy now that I know for myself that I CAN do parallel parking!

Third, friends and relatives who gave me the confidence that I need - who kept saying, "you'll do great!" That always lifted up my spirit.

Fourth, and the most important, is the Lord. Yes, I know, a bit cheesy but I am serious. Ever since I failed my first test here in Las Vegas, I was really down about myself and I always doubted myself. I thought I will never have a driver's license... especially when I heard about some other licensed drivers who didn't have to do parallel parking during their test. Getting a license meant a lot to me, especially here in the US, because I can't do much of what I need to do here as a stay-home mom without it as I could back in the Philippines. So I prayed a lot and read a lot from the scriptures and Church magazines. I prayed to just help me find the confidence I need, and to help me learn how to drive safer, and more specifically to learn how to do parallel parking. Days before my test, I asked Jesse if he could give me a blessing before I take my test. So on that day (yesterday), he did. And I am grateful for having a priesthood holder in our home. I've always believed in the power of a priesthood blessing no matter how big or small the blessing is for. My dad gave me priesthood blessings whenever I needed it - mostly for major exams or when I left home to go to BYU-H.

Jesse blessed me to have the confidence that I need and to be calm (because I always freaked out on my previous tests) and that I will do well. I know the lady (the "tester") wasn't extremely nice to me by chance. I had the blessing before my test and I know the lady was somehow prompted to help me have a more calm and relaxed "driving environment" that day. We talked about a lot of things while we were driving around and because of her friendly personality, I was calm and became confident in myself, though it made it harder for me to focus on my driving while talking to her. I relied on the Lord first & firmly believed that if I ask, He will help me ("ask and ye shall receive...") and He helped me find the confidence I needed through another person - the one I least expected to receive it from (the "tester").

So all I'm saying is, I received my driver's license but I didn't do it all on my own. The power of prayer works and nothing is too big or too small to ask our Heavenly Father about. He knows what is best for us and if it is His will, He will give it to us. He said "no" to me the first two times because I always relied on my own "strength" (and only remembered Him on the day of my tests), and I think it's also because I still lack the knowledge of how to drive safely. But now that I am driving better than how I did in Hawai'i - and actually know how to parallel park - He said "yes" this time and helped me feel that I really earned this one with His help through other people.

Babies and a Tie

2011-07-05T22:44:00.000-07:00

I almost forgot to post about the latest (and so far the last) handmade cards I made last month but it's never too late, right?!? :)

CARD #1: For my sister-in-law, Sarah:

She recently gave birth to a healthy 10 pound baby boy! CONGRATULATIONS!!!

Card #2: For a sister in our ward at Church, Elise Burnett:

Elise is due to give birth some time this month. It's their first baby so it's really exciting!

Cards #3: For Jesse (Father's day card)

I used to fold papers into a shirt like this back in high school and I almost forgot how to do it. The tie I used is from a Father's day sticker set that I got from Michael's. The next card was made by C, I only helped him how to make his very first handmade card:

He had so much fun tracing his hands with me, coloring the greeting card and the envelope, and adhering the "I heart my Daddy" printout onto another card stock paper. He was still kind of oblivious of what we were doing but I am just glad he was able to make it with me for Father's day.

Videogames

2011-07-03T23:41:00.000-07:00

If you know me even just a little bit, you'll know that I'm not a big fan of videogames - and watching TV - even though we had those at home growing up. I'm not saying I don't like them at all. I just want to avoid them as much as possible because I KNOW I can get hooked to them. I loveD (yes, past tense) videogames when I was a little girl. But my days of video gaming ended ever since the "joystick" switched from a simple flat gadget with just a cross on the left side, 4 buttons on the right (black and red A & B's), a select and a start button

This picture doesn't have the red A & B buttons [turbo]

to something more complicated that vibrates on its own with gazillion other buttons (x, triangle, circle, square, etc) and switches all around.

Add also the changes in graphics from 2d to 3d that made me dizzy, I was totally content to stop myself from wasting my time in video gaming.

But, I must admit... it is out of playing video games (usually my husband's love for it) that made Jesse and I find some friends in Hawai'i that we will never forget...

Yes, NATE, I am actually saying thanks to you (the husbands) "addiction" (playing 'til past 12 midnight, ahem!) to NBA LIVE while us, your wives, were all pregnant because it is one of the many (okay, the MAJOR) contributor to having friends like you and the Gellors. Even though I know the frequent "chillaxing" in Sharks' Cove or Waimea Bay, or eating some garlic shrimp together, random FHE's, Sunday potlucks at the Gellors, or the Big Island trip, or any other crazy fun things we did as a group definitely have contributed to developing (drama) our friendship, it all started when the men (sige na nga, kayo na panalo) started playing VIRTUAL basketball together.

Bottom line is, even though I'm a firm believer that video games, IF UNCONTROLLED, is a waste of time, I am still glad that it brought the "boys" in our group together which eventually brought the ladies together, too (because we had nothing else to do but to "talk stories" while the boys scream and yell at each other in the midst of their game), and formed a whole group of friends. I miss hanging out with you all!

C Dear

2011-06-20T14:17:00.000-07:00

C just celebrated his birthday.

At his age now, his favorite things are wooden puzzles.

He just graduated from a 12-piece puzzle,

and I bought him a 24-piece puzzle to see if he can do it.

I bought him a "set of 4" Melissa and Doug 12-piece puzzle last month after he

basically can pretty much do his first 12-piece puzzle on his own

in less than 3 minutes

.. but the month wasn't even over yet and he could

already figure out all 5 puzzles (including the new 4 ones) on his own
- again in less than 3 minutes each.

So I guess he's ready for a 24-piece puzzle.

He also has the classic tupperware Shape-O Ball toy,
a shape sorter toy thing, that he likes to play with.
He will really look for the right "slot" for each shape,
and if it is wrong, he will look for another one.
He can figure it out on his own but he loves it when we help him.

He now knows his English alphabet - actually since he was 21 months old.
He can sing/say them in order, and tell you
which letter you just drew for him.

He loves to count.
He learned to count from 1-10 when he was 20 months old.

Now he's learning to count to 20.

He can count from 1-15 and then jumps to 18, 19, 20.

Hahahaha!!!

He loves his colors.

He figured out his colors last month.

He knows red, blue, yellow, green, pink, purple, brown,

black, white, and grey.
Sometimes he gets confused between red and blue, though.
And he still can't answer the question, "What color is _____?"
even though he knows some of the colors.

He loves to swim.

He'd just jump into the pool without any fear at all,

and then rise up to the surface on his own.

Sometimes he wants to "swim" on his own too.

He loves to watch animated movies,
especially Toy Story and Cars.
Once in a while I let him watch some videos on Netflix like
Blues Clues, & Thomas and Friends.
Sometimes he watches the Youtube playlist that I made for him
that's just full of nursery things like the alphabet, shapes, numbers, & colors.
That's basically how he learned his alphabet (from A-Z) at a young age.

He loves trains, cars, school bus, trucks - anything with wheels!
He had a blast when we visited Travel Town in L.A.
during the Memorial Day weekend.
He loved looking at all the big, old trains.

He is pretty much starting to talk a lot more,
& expresses himself more verbally.
He is in the imitating phase where he basically just says
anything we say - like a cute echo!
So, yeah, we are more cautious about what we speak now
than we ever did (although we have always tried).
He loves to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star",
"Baa Baa Black Sheep,"
"Itsy Bitsy Spider,"
"Alphabet Song,"
"I am A Child of God,"
and other songs he has on his Youtube playlist
although he hasn't gotten to sing them verbatim just yet.
All in all he is our happy little fella.

Children are Expensive

2011-06-12T22:27:00.000-07:00

One thing I noticed about becoming a parent is that there is a constant flow of "expenses" from the moment you get pregnant with the first baby (lab fees, co-pays). You and the people who loves you buy the stroller, the car seat, clothes, diapers, wipes, toiletries, baby formula (if you weren't nursing - thank goodness I did even just for 15 months), baby bottles, toys, swings, etc. And just when you thought you had "just enough," you realize you need to buy a new batch of diapers (or onesies or any other clothing item) one size bigger. Next thing you know, you're changing your baby bottles to a set of sippy cups. There really seems to be not enough for the little kiddo while he is "growing" because you keep changing things -- diaper sizes, clothes, car seats, etc. Okay, the bed too. But anyway, you get my point. Having kids is expensive (even though they really are priceless children of God).

(Photo grabbed from Google images)

But my term of "expensive" in this one is not the kind where you always have to buy brand new things. What I meant is that having children will affect your income in a way that it will be a constant disbursement of money from the household income - but it doesn't have to be the kind of expenses where it puts a big hole in your pocket(s).

Not to brag or anything, but what I've liked about our lifestyle (me and my husband's) is that even though we do want some new things every now and then (new computer, new phones, new tv, new etc...) we usually are content with used things or just what we have. Sure every once in a while we'll buy something new but we usually are fine with what we have. I can't believe that we have survived three years of our marriage without cable TV.

The same thing goes when it comes to our son. Lately I've only been shopping at a hand-me-down children's store and it ALWAYS make me happy that I got some new "used" clothes for my son that fit him (except for the last batch of 24 months size that I bought - I think they shrank even before they got to the store). I can almost always buy 5 pairs of clothes for under $20 bucks and they always look new - well at least I pick the ones that are still in great condition. He wouldn't care (at least while he's still not a teenager) if his newly bought clothes are hand-me-downs. As long as we could provide his basic needs for him, we're happy. It doesn't have to be brand new - or branded (though I love Carter's... hehe). Once in a blue moon we would go to Walmart and buy a pair of new clothing for under $10 bucks.

I think it is also important to know where you can save more money even though you have to buy some brand-new things (like diapers and diaper wipes). I love Amazon Prime. Not only do they always have a two-day FREE shipping, but we just love seeing the ratings first before we buy anything. That website is also what we use to buy our diapers and wipes. My accountant husband actually did the math first (per diaper and wipes) before deciding which brand is best to purchase. We also compare prices at different brick-and-mortar stores for the items that we need to buy new. Bottom line is, it pays at least a few more savings if we spend more time "researching" online where the best deals are.

Even though we try to live a simple life, there are some things that we do want to buy brand-new, like gifts for birthdays and Christmas. Sometimes it is for safety reasons. Like a car seat for one. There are just certain things in life that you can't risk buying used, you know.

I think it is a good training for us as a couple (and as individuals) to be satisfied with what we have and do our best (we still have a lot of room for improvement) to live within our means - especially knowing the fact that we are a one-income family. I think it (living within our means) is also a good training for our son and our future additional children in a way that they will know that they are not always entitled to have every nice things in the world... especially nowadays when most of us think and feel that we are entitled to have everything - and fast! I want my children to know for themselves that life can throw them simple things and everything is still all right.

I Got By With A LOT of Help....

2011-06-08T21:55:00.000-07:00

Today was kind of an interesting day and I just want to write it down so I can write it down in my journal once I catch up again (I'm more than a month behind).

I signed up for babysitting in my ward at our Church here in our area BEFORE I got pregnant in hopes that I can somehow help my husband earn some income. A few weeks ago a sister from our ward emailed me asking if I wanted to do babysitting for her, 3 consecutive days a week from 7:30am-4:30pm for three weeks. I was like, "sure" (because I could still move around freely those days even though I had my baby bump already). I figured I would be done by June which would be my "uncomfortable" month to move around belly-wise. But then she got back to me asap and told me that she didn't need me to babysit for her anymore which I totally understood.

Then yesterday morning, I opened my email and BAM! There she was again - a last minute favor to babysit for her (today and tomorrow). Unfortunately I have something coming up tomorrow but I agreed to babysit for her today because I felt bad saying no. She just seemed like she needed someone to look after her kids. Anyway, I wasn't sure how I was going to do it, though, because I have been really uncomfortable moving around lately. I didn't think she'd want me to be her permanent babysitter (knowing that I'm pregnant) so I didn't charge her (she was asking how much I want to charge her).

It was a good learning experience. Ever since the kids (3 and 5 y.o.) got out of their car, I've been wondering how my stay-at-home sister-in-law ever did it when she was pregnant with their 4th child.. or any other parent for that matter. I guess what made it kind of "stressful" for me was the fact that I didn't have it slowly, it wasn't like an additional child in our family every year or so - it was BOOM! Here you go with two more kids TODAY (making it three if you count my son)! And that freaked me out, I guess. Plus, I am very much inexperienced taking care of children older than 2 years old. Sure, I taught the primary (ages 4-7 y.o.) in Hawai'i but it was only for an hour. This day was different, it was longer than 1 hour.

Well, I'm glad to say that I didn't just do it alone. My very good friend (and the bombest.com person ever) Erin helped me out. The older child was asking for a videogame as soon as he walked into our door earlier this morning - and we didn't have any. We don't even have cable to have them watch something and I didn't want to let them spend the whole day watching movies. I figured they might get bored being stuck in our little condo. So I let them play a little while with my son's toys (it's pretty cool how creative kids can get with their imaginations) while I asked Erin if she could help me take the kids to the park. Luckily, she said yes. I didn't have the kids' car seats so we had to walk ... under the hot sunlight ... before lunchtime... only to get there and they didn't want to play much. Well at least we tried. It was a good thing I had a stroller and a little bike so at least only one of the three kids had to walk (they all took turns walking).

I felt like I was going to pass out on our walk home from the park (it was darn too far to walk and too hot). Erin was really so nice to me when we got home. I thought she was going to go home as soon as she helped me take the kids back to my home. But she stayed with me and did so much in helping me feed the children some lunch. Now I know it can really get frantic when you have more than 2 kids. I almost always forgot about my own son ... and I always forgot what I was about to do and for who. My mind was occupied with different things (and being pregnant doesn't help remembering things either) while the children asked for this and that at the same time. Other than the mealtimes (I also served them breakfast this morning from our own stash because all they had packed for them was their food for lunch), everything else was better (though not mellow) because they were just content playing with each other. My son was kind of left out all the time, though, but that's okay. He's still trying to learn some social skills because he mostly spends his days just with me. I did encourage him every now and then to join the other two children in their "pretend-play." I guess their pretend-play is far too advanced for him and he still couldn't talk in a complete sentence which made it harder for him to play with them.

I tried to put them down for a nap, all three of them. But the siblings just wouldn't go to bed. The little girl (3 y.o.) was really tired but her older brother kept playing with her in our bedroom so she couldn't sleep. We (Erin and I) waited and tried quite a few times to let them take a nap but it was just hard because the older brother just wouldn't take a nap. So I decided to stay with them in our bedroom (I was exhausted too) and Erin went home to take a nap. It wasn't long 'til I snoozed a little bit and the little girl fell asleep (they behaved the whole time I was there). The two boys (the older brother and my son) didn't take a nap, though. C RARELY doesn't go down for a nap by himself. Today was one of those days.

Their mom picked them up an hour earlier than she said she would which is always a good thing. I had to wake up the little girl from her nap, though. I cleaned up our little condo (a place where it looked like a tornado just passed by) before Jesse came home and it reminded me of the post (a joke) I had earlier about stay-home moms. All in all, they were nice children with great imaginations and I learned a lot from them today - especially on how it MIGHT (because not every family is the same) look like for me someday.

June

2011-06-06T22:20:00.000-07:00

What I feel like doing whenever I plan my week each week this month

It's just the first week of June and yet I am feeling so overwhelmed by everything that is going to happen in the next few weeks. Never in my "after college" life that my weekly planner got filled up each time. I keep telling my husband that there are just so many things coming up this month and I hope my now-forgetful brain (thanks to pregnancy) can keep track of everything.

Well, it's not really that much but I just feel like they are. There are birthdays (relatives, friends, and our son), baby shower(s), friends & family coming over, a holiday, doctor appointments (both for me and Caleb), church callings, and A WEDDING!!!

And I am stressing out about that wedding (the most) even though I don't have to. I can't help it. It's my sister's wedding! This month is just so full (at least that's how I feel) that it feels like it's hard to keep track of everything, especially when there are certain events that are happening at the same day(s). I'm glad they invented calendars and came up with planners/organizers! I bet it is 10000000000x more stressful for my sister and her fiance.

Children in the Cabin

2011-06-04T21:34:00.000-07:00

There was something on Facebook I couldn't let go today - perhaps it's because of my pregnancy hormones or just the fact that I am a parent, or just plainly a combination of both. Or maybe it's just because of our recent experience in our flight home to Vegas last weekend that got me fired up today (the so-called "open-seating" airline gave all of the passengers with kids assigned seats - EVERYONE OF US AT THE VERY BACK). Either way, I take no offense now (than I did earlier) because it shouldn't affect me at all (because C is such a good "flyer".. lol!) but I just think it was something I had to speak/talk about. It was about a friend's status on how she wishes that the 2-year old toddler and the infant who was aboard the aircraft she was in won't cry or throw tantrums...

.. and I get her point. IT IS not fun flying at all, let alone having frantic, screaming kids on-board especially when it's more than an hour flight. Not to brag or anything but Jesse and I have been fortunate enough with C because he's always been good with our flights - except for when we flew to the Philippines and back (couldn't blame him - a 15-18 hour flight one way is long enough for an adult, let alone for a toddler). But even then, he was content just to be walked around by his Dad.

(Flight back to the US from the Philippines)

I have to be honest - it WAS kind of bugging me (when I was single) whenever I flew and I heard babies or toddlers cry like they were being tortured, especially when it's non-stop. But ever since I became a parent, I just have to say it's just not that easy to wish your little one won't cry during the flight. For one thing, it is the parents (besides their own kids) who are the most uncomfortable flying with toddlers and babies in tow, and more so when their little ones cry. The parents are the ones who are having the hardest time among any others who are aboard the plane. They have to deal with the crying, with their kid, and with the embarrassment that they feel whenever their little ones throw tantrums. Adding up the annoyance of the other passengers and their sighs and whatever signs they make to let the parents know it's getting annoying doesn't make the flight any easier to the parents at all.

Sometimes the parents can't do anything about the crying. For one thing, it hurts the little ones' ears when the plane takes off and when it's about to land. And they don't know what to do yet because they're too young to know, unless their parents help them (by nursing them or giving them a bottle or something to suck on). Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Second, you won't ever know if that infant was colicky. Colicky children, based on what I've read in some books, are really hard to calm down. Third, you don't know if that child just wasn't feeling good and flying adds up to their stress (but for some darn good and important reasons, they just have to fly that day).

I rest my case. I just can't believe how we tend to get insensitive sometimes with what we say about other people just because we are not in those people's shoes (this is about something in general, not just parents with kids onboard). I have no problems with our little guy (can't say that yet about our second one or for when we fly with both of them) when we fly, but I do feel for some other parents who already have it hard and yet people just won't try to understand them. I think it would help the parents more if other passengers were a bit more friendly to them and actually offer help to them (especially if the parent is travelling alone with his/her kid/s).

Baby Card

2011-05-30T15:32:00.000-07:00

One of the members of our ward's Relief Society presidency at Church

is expecting baby number 2 - and they're having a boy!

(Their first is a girl).

She had her surprise baby shower recently

thrown by a sister in our ward (who is also expecting)

but sadly, I couldn't come because I got sick.

Anyway, I did have a gift for her

and my friend was kind enough to take it to the shower

for me in my behalf.

With that little gift, I also sent her this handmade

baby card that I made just the night

before I found out the changes in her baby shower's date:

Side note: whenever I include an envelope in my pictures,

that means I made the envelopes too.

I have at least 5 more handmade cards to make within just 2 weeks,

but I love making them.

I am sure it'll be a lot faster once I get those nice crafting tools

but they can always wait.

For now, I love spending 2+ hours (each) making my handmade cards

(I spend that much time hinking about the layout, the design,

color theme, & finally making them).

End of May Birthdays

2011-05-30T15:24:00.000-07:00

Here are my new cards that I made a few weeks ago.

They are for two sisters in our ward at Church

who are both celebrating their birthdays on the same day

(end of May).

I was waiting for the days to pass by

(for when I actually can give them to my friends)

before posting them on my blog so they don't get a "spoiler"

of their handmade cards from me.. hehehe!

With these birthday cards, I found the template/inspiration/idea

(however you want to call it)

from Ruth Muzeen.

She has a crafting blog called, "Flower Sparkle"

I just love and adore all of her handmade cards.

These are her handmade birthday cards that I "copied"

(my first time copying somebody else's card ideas)

These are my version of those cards:

They are not as good as hers but I like them a lot.

I actually sent her a message

(through a comment on her blog post)

for her permission to post her cards here but she never got back to me

(she did post my comment in her blog, though,

but for some reasons I can't find that blog post anymore).

Knowing myself, I always like to decorate

the "dedication page" as well so for this one,

it's actually my own idea:

I just used a flower rubber stamp that my friend Shellanie

gave to me (thanks for all of them)

to use as embellishments.

Happy birthday to my friends, Erin and Brendi!

Stay-at-Home Moms

2011-05-24T14:03:00.000-07:00

A sister in our ward at Church posted this on her Facebook wall today (which she said she also saw from her friend's wall) and I just had to post it because it's so funny!

"A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a Cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door. He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls. As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, 'What happened here today?' She again smiled and answered, 'You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world do I do all day?' 'Yes,' was his incredulous reply. She answered, 'Well, today I didn't do it."

It's Potty Time, You Can Do It I Know... [Later]

2011-05-19T11:06:00.000-07:00

C is in the age to be potty trained now.
He tells me now whenever he went for #2 (not yet for #1)
but it's always AFTER he went.
I think it's a good sign that he's almost ready to be potty trained.
Even so, feel like holding off until he's around 2 ½ years old.
I just feel like it might backfire once the baby comes.
Anyway, all experienced potty trainers out there who are reading
this blog, I need some input on some "tricks"
on how to potty train toddlers - especially BOYS.
I heard girls are always easier.
I've heard about cheerios, m&m's, stickers,
changing into an underwear completely for the day, etc.
Are there any tricks that worked for you?
I know every kid is different but it would help a lot if I can
get some ideas before I start this thing.

I might as well sing and dance to this when I start him in December:

I love this video because the song is just so upbeat
and I love Elmo's dad's southern accent.

This morning C wasn't feeling good.
He woke up in the middle of the night screaming with his eyes closed
(maybe that's not waking up but more like "sleep screaming"),
his face buried on his bed and he was curled up a bit.
It seemed like he wanted to throw up for a moment but he didn't go.
Then he went back to sleep as I rubbed his back.

When the sun was out and he was ready to play,
he didn't want to play for longer than 2 minutes by himself.
He wanted to cuddle with me instead.
He'd whisper, "daddy mommy" all the time,
which is what he always does when he's sad or in a bad mood.
So I cuddled with him. 'Til he fell asleep.
Right this moment he's sleeping in our bedroom because
he didn't want me to leave his side when he was falling asleep.
I hope he gets better soon.
He's still fun and all but he just feels so weak.

(PS. What are some nice toddler soups/meals when they are sick?)

Sweet melody

2011-05-15T16:27:00.000-07:00

I was getting frustrated with a lot of things lately that

it makes me get angry at little things very easily.

But C is such a sweetheart.

His lips were smudged with some strawberry-banana milk shake

when he gave me a smile.

Then this song played in our laptop - right in the middle of when things

became really quiet... when all I could hear was the ticking of our wall clock.

It was like the Spirit was telling me not to forget

what I've always wanted growing up.

And my frustration, selfishness, and bad temper could ruin that.

It still makes me cry right up to this point.

Right away, I felt so bad for getting frustrated at things easily.
I gave my little buddy a hug and told him I love him.

(I can't let C see me with tears because, seriously, he bawls!

It's like he was the one who got hurt. It's funny.)

I Won't Have it Any Other Way

2011-05-08T21:38:00.000-07:00

My mother's day has been a very simple day so far. But I love it the way it is.

Our little kiddo woke us (actually, just me) up this morning at 9:30am. We bugged Daddy for a while in our bedroom before I got ready to start the day. I didn't even remember that it's Mother's Day today. I was busy doing my usual morning routine with C. When we got out to the living room, Jesse was already awake and up even though he looked like he still could go to sleep for another hour. Then he greeted me, "Happy Mother's Day!" That's only when I remembered what day it is today.

I was taking care of C when Jesse asked me what I wanted for breakfast. I didn't want him to fix me anything (because I don't eat breakfast), but I really found it sweet and very thoughtful. Then he washed some dishes for me (C's things mostly). He was really looking for something to do for me today and it really made me feel special and appreciated.

Right at this moment, he is making our dinner - coconut shrimp with apricot sauce/dip - which I found yesterday in one of our cookbooks (Betty Crocker cookbook). I was originally the one who was going to make it tonight. Today at Church, he told me he's going to make our dinner instead... and here he is now being the sweetest chef in the world in our little kitchen.

C gave me lots of kisses today both at home and at Church. It's been a while since he really cuddled with me for a long time (since I got my baby bump) without getting distracted by other things. Today he cuddled with me at Church and when we got home after. Also he was a very good boy at Church today during the sacrament meeting. He's always been an easy little fella but today he was twice as easy at Church. I love it when he says, "I la loo Mommy" or "I la loo Daddy" (I love you Mommy/Daddy). It just makes my heart melt.

Our little one was a bit more behaved today inside my belly. He's more active than C was when he was in my belly. But today he decided to be mellow, even though he still gave me strong jabs here and there once in a while.

This is my second mother's day holiday so far and this has been the simplest one (last year Jesse took me to this massage place for a full-body massage) but guess what...

I won't have it any other way!

I love spending time with my man and my little guy. I love playing games with Jesse. For one I think it's funny and kinda cute when he gets all competitive. I love playing with our son. He's so cute I could squeeze and kiss his cheeks all day long. I love feeling our little one inside my belly. They all make me happy more than the gifts I receive. No material things or hours of full-body massage can compare to the joy I feel by just being with them than anywhere else in the world. I love my little family so much! The acts of appreciation for me is more than enough. I feel so blessed to have them... my boys (oh my I'm being outnumbered). I am especially thankful and really appreciative of my sweet husband who always makes me feel special both on special days and on regular, ordinary days - well, even much more on special days like our anniversary, mother's day, my birthday, and Christmas. I often feel that I haven't done enough for him and he has done so much for me.

Happy Mother's Day

2011-05-07T22:21:00.000-07:00

Some quotes I have from my book, "Errand of Angels In Honor and Praise of Mothers"

"As I come to understand the many talents and characteristics

of women, I realize how needed their strengths are in this

dispensation. We must remember that we are daughters of God

here to provide nurturing care for one another, family and friends -

loving care to soften the changes of life felt by all.

What a great opportunity we have to fill our God-given role.

He has given us the privilege to shape the lives of those entrusted

to our care. Even those of us who have not been blessed to have

children of our own can still be influential as trainers and nurturers.

It does not matter where we live, whether we are rich or poor,

whether our family is large or small. Each of us can share that

Christ-like love in our 'motherly ministry.' "

- Barbara W. Winder

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"There are times when only a Mother's faith

Can help us on life's way

And inspire in us the confidence

We need from day to day.

For a Mother's heart and a Mother's faith

And a Mother's steadfast love

Were fashioned by the Angels

And sent from God above."

- Anonymous

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"I think every working mom goes through the times

when you feel that if you weren't working

perhaps you'd be giving them a little more.

I've always believed the quality of the time

is so much more important than the quantity."

- Jackie Zeman

Happy Mother's Day both to those who have children

and to those who are still waiting to have children!

DL Test

2011-05-06T22:03:00.000-07:00

Well, my big day is tomorrow. I am going to take my driver's license test for the second time. My first time was in Hawaii in 2008. I did not pass that one. The lady was so scary I've been afraid to take the test again since then.

But knowing that I need my license now more than ever (going to have 2 kids plus more doctor's appointments when the second baby comes and it's not as close as it used to be in BYU-H where I could just walk to the clinic for appointments) is giving me the motivation to get it. I don't know if I will pass it tomorrow, I just want to see what the outcome will be. If I pass it, GREAT! If I don't, I can just try again.

The difference now than before is that I'm just glad it's gonna be A LOT less stressful for me this time around because:

1) I won't be driving a manual car/stick shift. Our first car was a manual car and that's what I used in Hawai'i to take the test (that's the first and last manual car I ever drove in my entire life). I think I don't have to elaborate how stressed I was when I took my test back then, especially in every stop light/sign, or whenever I had to step on my breaks (I hated shifting gears all the time)... hehe!

2) There aren't any uphill/downhill roads where I am going to take my test so I'm sure they won't make me do parallel parking going uphill (which the lady in Hawai'i told me to do and I haven't had any experience doing parallel parking whatsoever, let alone doing it uphill in-between cars. No, she didn't use cones for me.. sad)

3) Our car is REEEEAAAALLLLLLY reliable, it won't just die on me out of the blue. The used cars we had in Hawai'i (even after the manual one) all broke in less than a month which always made me have second thoughts in retaking the test there because I didn't want the car dying on me during the test (I know I'm not supposed to take the test with those kind of cars anyway).

4) I really read the driver's manual this time so I could pass the written/driver's permit test because the manual didn't come with the Q&A portion of the test... haha! At least now I know the rules of the road a bit more completely (if not perfectly) than I did in Hawai'i. The Hawai'i Driver's manual I had had that Q&A pages. I just read the questions and answers and took the written test so I really didn't know much about the rules of the road... just the very basics.

5) I am just really determined to get my driver's license before I give birth. I need it so bad so I can take myself around without depending on anybody else. If I don't get it before then, I really want to get it before our baby's 2nd month (when he gets his first vaccines).

Soooooooo...... wish me luck!

Puzzles and Analogy

2011-05-04T15:10:00.000-07:00

I've had this post in "draft" for sometime now because

I was waiting to catch some photos to include in this post.

Credits to my obedient little sweet guy, C, who had lots of patience with me

whenever I told him to "pause" and "hold that position."

He did "hold it" when I told him to...
for letting me tell him to put the wrong shape at the wrong hole

(he has his shape sorter figured out already).

Oh, and for letting me give him the wrong piece in his puzzle

and put it in the wrong place even though it was confusing to him

because I was asking him to put it at the wrong spot

(he knows his puzzle now).

All these troubles just so I could take the pictures I wanted. Hehe!

You're such a big sport, C! :)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I love playing with C in the daytime.

He loves to play with his "mind games" like his 12-piece puzzle,

shape sorter, alphabet blocks, etc.

One day, months ago when he was still learning the concept of his shape sorters,

he got a little bit upset

because he couldn't put most of the shapes inside the ball

(it was the classic Tupperware Shape-o Ball toy).

He looked at me as if he was asking for my help, so I did.

He was happy when "we" finally finished it.

And then there was another day when he finally had

the interest to play with his 12-piece trucks puzzle.

It was one of the very first time he had any interest in playing with it.

But he couldn't figure out which pieces go together.

Again, he asked me to help him and I did.

When we finally finished the whole puzzle, he exclaimed,

"Oooh... trrruuucccckkk!!!!"

He was happy to see the drawings of the trucks that he saw

from putting his puzzle together - with me.

Recently, I wanted for some certain things in my life

to happen the way I wanted them to or the way I wished it could.

But because of some circumstances, they couldn't... or at least not yet.

As I watched C in those first few days that he was

playing with his "mind games," I had an analogy pop up in my head.

I may see a sector shape and try to put it inside a triangle hole,

or I may see a hexagon and try to put it in a pentagon hole

and I may get upset because it doesn't work out the way

I 'thought' it should.

In other words, I may get upset when certain things in my life

don't work out the way I want them to.

But if I only take the time to kneel down and ask for His help,

the One who knows the situation better than I do & Who knows how

to solve it and what to do, just like how C asked me,

I will be able to know what to do that is in accordance to His will

just like how C was able to figure out his shape sorter with my help.

It will work out.

I just need to know if my will (my shapes)

is in accordance to His will (the holes in the ball)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

There are some situations in life that I am clueless about

and I don't know why we had to go through it,

either as an individual or as a family.

Sometimes I get so impatient

especially when it comes to wanting to know

why things has to happen in a certain way

and wanting impatiently to know how it would turn out in the end.

I can only see a piece of the puzzle.

But if I take that piece of puzzle (or piece of experience in life) and ask

His help so I may know what to do with what I am given,

according to what His plans are for me,

I will be able to figure it out, and I will see the bigger picture.

It is indeed a beautiful plan from Him.

Much more beautiful than that piece I saw (certain experiences)

before I asked for His help.

Receiving His help - and aligning my will with His -

will give me a better perspective about

the "pieces" of both the trials and joy that I have experienced,

am experiencing, and will experience in life

because in the long run I know that through those pieces,

I will be able to have a better and bigger "picture" someday.

It may or may not be during this earth life,

but it definitely will be sometime after.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Sometimes, I complain about things more often than I need NOT to,

and I forget to be thankful for what I have.

I can only see a missing piece in the puzzle.

But if I put His will first all the time, and obey Him,

I will be given the piece I need (blessings) to fill the holes in my life.

I cannot do things on my own.

Just like C's experiences with his puzzles and shapes,

there are things in life that I "think" should work out the way it should,

the way it has to, or the way I want them to.

But, just like the way I was with C's situation

(who knew when was doing it wrong and when he's right),

the Lord knows things much much much better than I do.

He knows what needs to be done.

All I need to do is ask Him, obey Him, and have faith.

Things will eventually work out

according to His own plans and timetable.

"For the brother of Jared said unto the mountain Zerin,

Remove - and it was removed.

And if he had not had faith it would not have moved;

wherefore [Thou] workest after men have faith."

(Ether 12:30)

"Yea, and how is it that ye have forgotten that

the Lord is able to do all things according to His will,

for the children of men,

if it so be that they exercise faith in Him?

Wherefore, let us be faithful to Him."

(1 Nephi 7)

July 15, 2011

2011-04-29T15:03:00.000-07:00

I am excited for July 15th to come because of this:

I haven't read the books.

I tried to read the first one (Sorcerer's Stone)

but I only got to the part where

Harry was buying all of his school supplies with Hagrid.

My limited, although not very few, English vocabulary made it kind of

boring for me to read all the books.

It's funny because I like Harry Potter series, and I don't like the Twilight saga

but I've read all of the Twilight books (thanks, BYUH Library).

After we watched the 1st part of the Deathly Hallows last year,
and being kind of lazy to read all the books,
I just started watching all of the Harry Potter movies all over again -
from the beginning.
We have most of them (thanks, Jesse).
For the movies that we didn't have, thanks Netflix! Hehe!
I was always confused to what was going on whenever we watched
the movies so I wanted to go over each one all over again.
Now I am not so confused.

I am so excited!!!
I think Jesse finds it funny when I think about
which side Snape is really on (I'm kind of rooting for him).
I keep telling Jesse that I think Snape is still on the good side and
he's still Dumbledore's spy even though he "had to" kill Dumbledore.
I keep thinking about what was going to happen in this movie.
I even told him, "OH! HARRY WILL DIE!!!"
But then a spoiler on Yahoo! kind of gave me an idea that he won't.
I don't know.
At least I know now that Fred Weasley will die.
Other than that, I really don't have any idea what's gonna happen.
It makes me wanna read the books.
But we're missing the first one and the the third one (Prisoner of Azkaban).
Jesse used to have all of them.

Oh well, I guess I'm gonna have to wait for this movie.
I DEFINITELY would like to watch it in the theaters first,
but definitely not on the first week of its release
I am not a big fan of being in a huge crowd of people just for a movie.
For the record, we've never watched any of the Twilight movies in the theaters.
We always waited for BYUH to show it in the auditorium.
BYUH shows it 3-4 months later than the release date but at least it's
still on a widescreen and it's free!
Good thing we waited or it would've been a waste of money.
No offense, Twilight fans.

Dancing with my son

2011-04-26T14:22:00.000-07:00

I was feeling the day today because it's a very special day.
I opened up my Grooveshark playlist, "sweet dance"

then I danced the first song, "All the Way" by Celine Dion and Frank Sinatra,

with my little buddy boy, C.

Oddly enough, and Jesse RARELY sees me like this,

but I got choked up while I was dancing with my son.

For some reasons,

my mind fast-forwarded to the day of his future wedding and imagined him

dancing that same song with me - not as a little boy anymore,

but as a young man.

I know it's still years away but as the "experts" (our parents) say,

it goes by fast.

I immediately lied down on our couch,

and let my little buddy hug me

despite the big bulgy belly that's making it uncomfortable

to cuddle with him lately.

"Terrible twos" are definitely on the way,

but he's not that really terrible.

There are just some changes in him (like throwing tantrums WAY easily),

but we love him with all our hearts nonetheless.

He's still the sweet, cuddly, love-to-give-kisses, little guy we know.

We love him "all the way"...

My Eternal Companion

2011-04-26T08:00:00.000-07:00

It's been almost 4 years since the first time I met Jesse.
I am always thankful for that day,
because that day was a great blessing to me.
It's when I met my (then) future eternal companion
and we didn't even know it yet.

It's been a wonderful three-year journey with my husband.
There were ups and downs, and I had a lot of imperfections.
But he was always there for me,
ever so caring, gentle, loving, and understanding.
I will always be thankful to Him for being so good to me
and for letting me meet Jesse.
He is everything I ever hoped for a husband, and more.
I only hope I have been (so far) the kind of wife he deserves, because
he is such a good man.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY BEB!
Mahal na mahal kita!

I love these songs. Makes me think of Jesse.
Of course, it's not just "'til death do us part"...
it's forever!

"This much I know is true, that God blessed the broken road
that led me straight to you."

Semana Santa

2011-04-24T17:48:00.000-07:00

For those of you who have weak stomachs, I say

SKIP THIS POST!!!

If you don't like to see blood, SKIP THIS POST.

Here we go...

(ALL PHOTOS POSTED HERE, as well as some additional information,
WERE TAKEN & GIVEN BY JACOB PAUL REYES)

As some of you might know, I grew up in the Philippines - where most

citizens are devout Christians, mostly Catholics.

So, as a young girl, I grew up watching these men walk by our

streets on Good Friday every April doing their penance

during the Catholics' celebration of the "Semana Santa"

or Holy Week in the Philippines.
(the week leading up to Easter Sunday).

I've never really understood why they do this, though.

Probably just their way of showing their devotion.

Needless to say, the men's procession is the only thing I've seen my whole life,

although I knew they were also doing something else afterwards.

. . .

So, after their procession,

they leave their crowns of "thorns" (they are actually just leaves)

upon their arrival to the Cathedral.

And then they let their friends beat them some more

as they lie facing down on the ground,

as what kuya (big brother) Paul described it as their "last act of penance."

Those whips are made of stick and are just used to beat the backs

of the pennants and spread the blood all over,

not to give them wounds or anything.

Kuya Paul wrote in his description on this picture that the Catholic Church

"condemns this practice and does not let the devotees in"

that's why the front entrance of the Church was barricaded and this man (below)

would just have to do his penance in front of the cross

displayed outside by the church.

After their penance, the main passion play takes place where people carry their cross

to the hill (wherever that is - somewhere in Cutud [in my province]), I guess.

Actually in the past, this was only done in my province.

But recently other cities decided to make their own play as well.

These men were on their way to the hill:

Here you can see the three crosses on the hill at Cutud:

Then comes the raising of the men who were nailed t0 the cross

They were really nailed to the palms of their hands

Kuya Paul wrote on his description that this man (below) has been

nailed to the cross (according to the man himself) for the second time in his life.

Like I said, I don't know why they do this.

And like what kuya Paul wrote, the Catholic Church condemns this.

So I don't know why they still keep doing it.

But it's been a tradition in my country.

Why I like Vegas.... for now...

2011-04-15T14:57:00.000-07:00

Well, our original plan for being here in Vegas is out of the picture

(Jesse's master's degree).

So I've been wondering, aside from my husband's job,

what do I like for living here in Las Vegas?

I mean, as soon as you say the words "Las Vegas," it is common

for most people to think of words and/or phrases like

"sin city," "gambling," "casinos," "slot machines,"

"bright lights," "party all night long," "women with skimpy clothes," etc.

Besides, it's in the middle of nowhere,

Nevada was one of the states that was hardest hit by the recent recession,

and it gets so incredibly hot in the summer.

I'm definitely sure this is not where we want to settle down

for years and years to come.

So I was thinking lately, what are other things I like here?

ONE: It's cheap.

Pretty much almost everything is cheap.

Including houses.

A 3-bedroom, 3 bath house usually goes for $110K or less.

We even found a 4-bedroom one (3 baths) for 90K.

Too bad it was taken.

TWO: Filipino Stores

Ah! There are definitely a lot more Filipino stores and dining restaurants here than in Hawai'i.

I used to go crazy whenever I saw a "Jollibee" in California,

(McDonald's main rival in the Philippines)

but not anymore.

I love going to the Seafood City just because I feel like it brings me closer

to home even though the prices are in dollars.. haha!

Plus that's where I can usually find

the kind of food my Filipino taste buds are looking for.

Seafood City is a plus because Chowking, Red Ribbon, and Jollibee are inside

the building as well... and some other little Filipino stores.
It's kind of far from our place, but it's definitely closer than the one

we had in Hawai'i (Waipahu).

THREE: Our Ward

I love our ward at Church.
It is a big ward with lots of primary kids,

nursery kids (we have 4 or 5 nursery classes),

and plenty of babies!!!

Oh, and preggo sisters!

I just found out 3 weeks ago that there were 17 of us pregnant sisters in the ward

(probably more or less now since some gave birth

and some might have just found out they're pregnant too).

It's just much like our married ward in BYU-Hawai'i where there

were lots of children and babies and pregnant ladies.

Do you remember my old post when we were new (about friends)?

Well, in regards to that, I only have a few new friends in our ward... but

it's really fun when I get to do activities with them.

Ever since I had my calling, I liked the ward more,

whether I have a lot of friends or not.

This brings me to another reason why I like it here in Vegas:

FOUR: The LOCATION

Most of our friends from BYU-Hawai'i either live in California or in Utah.

I like being in Las Vegas because we're in-between those states.

Some of them would most likely would have to pass by

Las Vegas first before either going to Utah/California/Hawai'i.

In just our 8 months stay here,

we've met with some of my good friends from Hawai'i

and I love it!!!

(November 2010)

(December 2010)

(March 2011)

(April 2011)

We're definitely closer to our relatives now

than when we were in Hawai'i.

They are all scattered in California and Utah.
My in-laws get to come over as often as they want now

than when we were in Hawai'i.

I love being just half-way from those two states.

FIVE: HIKES!

I love being close to the Red Rock Canyon.

We have a year pass and it's been really great.

We all love hiking (including C)

so being close to a hiking/camping park is really nice.

Even though we live in the "sin city,"

we're not in the strip itself anyway and our area is not that bad.
I actually like it.

General Conference

2011-04-04T11:52:00.000-07:00

On Sat. and Sun. we had the opportunity to listen to the

171st General Conference

of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

For those who do not know, the General Conference occurs

every 6 months (April and October),

every first Saturday and Sunday of those months.

It is the time we (both LDS and non-LDS alike) have the opportunity

to hear and listen to the voice of the Lord through the

counsels of the prophet (now Pres. Thomas S. Monson),

and the messages of the apostles, and other leaders of our Church.

It is a great time to take a break from our daily routines

and feed ourselves spiritually.

Well, the General Conference weekend went good for us.
I said good because it was a lot harder to focus now that we have our little guy,

who, understandably so, can't sit still for two hours and listen

to the talks given by the speakers.

During the Sunday morning session, Jesse taught C

(at least for several minutes each time and towards the end)

how to be reverent by sitting with us and listening to the speakers.

He whispered the words uttered by the speakers

to our son's ears, and our little guy listened.

It worked each time but it didn't last longer than 15 mins.

All in all, he was good.

He didn't really make any fuss about us

spending two hours each time listening to the speakers.

It is natural for him, like any other kids, to play.

But I'm glad that he listened every time we asked him to listen,

and he prayed with us, and even pretended to be

the chorister every time the choir sang.

The one session I was able to focus on was

the Sunday afternoon session.
We were able to watch it as a couple (via the internet) while our son

was taking his afternoon nap.

And he didn't wake up until half an hour after the session ended.

For us, the main message of the Conference to us (in our family)

is about giving service to those who surrounds us.

Especially with what's happening in our world these days,

there are so many people who needs help.

I can't wait to receive the May issue of the Ensign magazine

so I can read the talks I missed and remind myself again about the

messages and counsels that we heard this month.

Outback Special

2011-03-31T14:05:00.000-07:00

We had another appointment with my ob/gyne yesterday.

She was running late.

There were too many of us there waiting for her

instead of the other doctors.

We waited in the lobby for over an hour.

They had t.v. in the lobby so I watched the Travel channel first,

then it became the Food channel (that's what it said).

They showed different steakhouse restaurants,

and it felt like total torture (hunger-wise) for me...

because I was hungry right at that moment

(it was lunchtime)

AND I've been craving steak for a long time now.

By the time we were called, everybody else was gone

(except for one more person besides us).

Then we just sat in the room for about less than 5 mins.

They didn't do any other check-up other than

the baby's heart (but we didn't know the heart rate).

The nurse then told me my doctor has to leave

(we haven't seen her that day yet)

because she's late for her scheduled c-section.

It was really frustrating.

I was kind of upset but I let it go because

I know that she is where she needs to be and that pregnant lady in labor

might be going crazy right then waiting for her.

I spent the whole afternoon almost by myself

because C took a nap right after we got home

(after his lunch)

'til about a half an hour before Jesse came home from work.

He's really a good sleeper.
We put him back in his room AGAIN 3 days ago and

he's been sleeping on his own both for his naptimes and bedtimes.

Anyway, Jesse called me up on his way home from work

and surprised me with a dinner date with my

choice of place to eat.
He gave me some options and I just said, "OUTBACK!"

"... 'cause I'm sure they have steak!"

Hahaha!

He even arranged a babysitting schedule for C before

letting me know about it.
Our friends were C's babysitters that night! :)

Oh, I felt so pregnant (I usually don't) yesterday night.
The waitress asked for our order and I was like,
"I'd like to try the Outback Special..."

Her: "Ok. You have two choice of sides."
Me: "Ok.. Aussie Fries and mashed potatoes."
Her: "Ok." (started turning to Jesse to for his order)

Me: "OH! And can I have the grilled shrimp with that too?"

Hahahaha!!!

Sorry lady, pregnant lady was starving!
I just thought it was funny.

When she served us the food, I had tons on my plate.

(I just found this picture on Live to Feast's blog)

It looked exactly like that one on the picture,
with the mashed potato included (not in the picture).
I told Jesse I felt like a starving pig.

(Good thing I only ordered the smallest portion of the meat - 6 oz.)

He just gave me a smile.
What a stud! I love that guy!

Oh and I finished everything!

YOU SHOULD TRY IT! It's awesomely good!

Of Things That Matter Most

2011-03-28T15:01:00.000-07:00

Yesterday at Church, we had a nice lesson about Pres. Uchtdorf's

last year's Oct. General Conference talk titled,
"Of Things That Matter Most"

I think it's pretty interesting that,

just two years after the prophet Pres. Monson's General Conference talk,

"Finding Joy in the Journey",

Pres. Uchtdorf reminded us again of things that matter most in this life.

What matters most is not our personal things/properties
(car, gadgets [cellphones, etc], or Facebook accounts),
or our jobs (though it's a necessity),
or our "status" as an individual
(Best Actress? Miss America? CEO?),
but it's our relationship with our Heavenly Father and our Savior,
our relationship with our family, friends, and our fellowmen.
Most of us know this already,
but a lot of us (if not all) still take it for granted.

It's been really "busy" in this world lately - even if it doesn't have to.
What I meant by that is - of course, we need to go to work
and all that to provide for our family.
But what are we doing when we are not at work?
When we are at home?

What are our priorities?
Is it work? Is it family? Is it ourselves? Our material things?
I think it helps us focus on things that matter most
when we know what our priorities are.

Example:

These days, technology is definitely a great "invention."
I do believe that Heavenly Father gave those bright minds to the people
whose been inventing these great technologies for our time
so these technologies can be put to good use.
Because of it, we can watch the upcoming General Conference this weekend
via the internet.
Because of it, we can stay connected with our family faster
(cellphones, email, or chat rooms)
than it ever did in decades past.
We can now search for things we don't know
or not too familiar about pretty easily
without having to go to a public library
and rack up all the shelves to find what we're looking for.

I can go on and on about the advantages of technology.
But everything has its pros and cons.
Technology, if not used right, can be a distraction too.

Take our groovy mobile phones, for example.
They're almost like - well, they ARE, handheld computers now
(at least that's how I see it).
You can surf the web, take photos and videos, play games, etc.
It's really beneficial and useful
(I love my husband's GPS on his phone).
But sometimes we spend too much time with it that it's hard to ever have
a good, nice, FOCUSED conversation with family and friends these days
w/o us fidgeting around these things at the same time.
Other 'distractions' to our priorities can be
videogames, computers, iPods, our household chores,
even our own hobbies.

I like technology. I think it is great.
I just think there should be limits to everything.

I am a stay-home wife and mother - full-time.
My priority is not the material things we have.
It is my relationship with our Father in Heaven and our Savior,
and my relationship with my family.

I know for myself that I try to get as much things done as I could
around our home as long as we don't have visitors.
I get so busy sometimes even to the point that our son has been
playing on his own for most hours of the day (usually Mondays).
Sometimes there's nothing I can do about it
(like when I clean our bathrooms -
I don't want him to smell the chemicals so I keep him inside his bedroom).
But sometimes I can do chores and play with him at the same time if I want to.
(like laundry days).

I've tried this past year to spend as much "quality" time as I could
with our son and not with the chores that needs to get done,
or being on the computer for a long time.

I try to stay away from the computer throughout the day each day
as long as our son is awake.

Sometimes I'm successful, sometimes I'm not.

I do get the chores done in a timely manner, and I get to reply
to my messages on my online accounts (like Facebook) all the time.
But I always make sure I spent the same amount of time (or even more)
with our son as I did with the chores around the house.
It actually is my main reason growing up why I wanted to stay home with
my kids - to spend time quality with them and take care of them.

Now our son is taking a nap - I AM ABLE TO BLOG!
As I am writing this post (with my thoughts scattered all around, obviously),
it makes me think at the same time if what I've been doing was enough.
I feel there is still a lot of room for improvement.

To be able to see what matters most,
I think about what I will take with me when I leave this earth -
the eternal perspective.
It's gonna be all about what I did while I was here.
Did I live my life on earth doing my best to be as "worthy" as I can be
to keep entering the Temple of the Lord?
Did I live it full of memories of my family with me,
and not with material things?
Did I share my blessings & have given service to my fellowmen enough?
More than enough?
Things like that. You know.

I have a couple of goals this... month (baby steps!)
First is to improve my spiritual well-being.
Second is to improve my relationship with my family.
These are what matters most to me.

I challenge you to make your goals too! :)

One, Two, Three, Foooooouuuurrrr....

2011-03-17T08:09:00.000-07:00

C knows how to count from 1-10.
Sometimes he does it right, sometimes he doesn't

(skips from 6 to 8,9,10).

He loves to count whenever we're climbing down the stairs,

or with his crayons,

or with his blocks:

I don't know how he learned to count from 1-10.
We didn't really force the numbers on him.
But I can remember we were watching this counting video on Youtube one time.
And then the next day he started counting perfectly from 1-10
(I even had that on my Facebook status last month).

In this video, though, he only counted from 1-5 because
he was missing some blocks to count 'til 10.
Hehe.

March... so far...

2011-03-14T15:55:00.000-07:00

We found a nice small table for our aquarium at the thrift store for $15
two weeks ago.
Our aquarium used to be on top of our "breakfast table."

The next day, Jesse helped me in setting up the aquarium

again - this time with the aerator, a lot less decors, a bit more gravel

(to better hold things in place),

and an Ecobio-Block Stone which I didn't put 'til the next day.

I think it (the bio-block) is a really nice investment
if you're planning to have a pet fish, - it's good for 1.5 - 2 years.

Our 5-gal tank is looking simply groovy! :P

5 days after, I did a partial water change on it just so it's a lot

safer for our next fish this time around before we buy them.
I also had my first chiropractor appointment that day.
Boy it felt good!
My hips/buttocks/tailbone (wherever)
still hurts once in a while
but it's not as bad as it was before.
I loved it when he cracked my hips/tailbone.
It felt like it's what I really needed for the longest time.

Last Saturday, I finally took my driver's permit test.

I had just finished reading the manual the week before,

and I skimmed through it one more time that morning before I took the test.

It's a walk-in basis for permit tests, so I really didn't have to

take it if I wasn't ready.
But my mood that morning was more like,

"Come what may! If I don't pass it, at least I know how the test is like."

Glad to know I passed it!

It was supposed to be 50 items but I only did 45 (I passed it by then).

It was a computerized interactive kind of test

(not the scantron thing like I had in Hawaii)

so it was more fun for me but at the same time more nerve-wracking

because I could see how many more items to go,

how many right answers I've had (need to be 40), and how many

mistakes I've made.

There was one point during my test that I could make

8 right answers to pass it, and 8 mistakes to fail it (11 is failed)

so that made me really nervous.

It was a good thing I skimmed through the manual once more

because some of the questions I encountered

were the ones I skimmed through that morning (and that I've forgotten).

Jesse was really happy for me.
So happy he made me drive home from Costco that same day.

Freeways is one of my weekness.

He was the one who looked at my blindspot (for now) for every

lane changes I had to make.
At least it wasn't like the first time I drove in a freeway,

in Hawaii,

in a manual car,

going 55mph to take my first driving test

(supposed to be but didn't because we were missing some papers).

Before that day, I only practiced in 1-lane roads

going 35 mph max.

That night, we bought 2 small comet goldfish for $0.13 each

(much cheaper than our first 3 fishies).

I will post their pictures someday.

They are alive 'til now!
I'm so happy!

C loved watching them the first time we put them in.

In the mornings, he says "Hi" to them. So cute!

He loves watching them eat.

Actually he loves watching the fish flakes float more than

watching the fish eat.

Today, I walked to the park (15 mins) to hang-out with our

friend and her sons.

C is about 8 months younger than their first son,

but they love playing with each other all the time.

It was tiring to walk back and forth

but I needed to go out.

And I'm glad she invited me to go because that made me

more motivated to walk that far.

Tomorrow, if the baby won't be shy, is the BIG day!
The day we'll know if we'll buy pink or blue clothes!
I can't wait!

Feb. Updates

2011-03-14T15:26:00.000-07:00

Nothing much is going on, really.

For February, Jesse and I went out on a date

at the strip one night during the Valentine's weekend.

My parents-in-law visited us that weekend

so we had the chance to go out on a date for the night.

They babysat C for us 'til the morning.

It was good to get out once in a while with just your spouse,

though we love our little guy a lot.
I missed him so much that night.

Then on Valentine's day, my in-laws made a special

fondue meal for our family dinner.

My father-in-law made, I believe, a cheese fondue (?!?) or

something similar to that (if I'm wrong)

and my mom-in-law made a smores fondue.

They were both good!

Then the day after Valentine's day,

we had our first doctor's appointment with our new Ob/Gyne.

It was our first ultrasound with our baby which I posted

a while ago here in my blog.

A few days after that, Jesse (after having started reading

the book, "Boys Adrift" thing), he had an impulse

to buy an aquarium for C, and I agreed.

We installed the aquarium that same night.

4 days after, we bought our first set of fish -

a red wag platty,

a moly. and a plecostomus (janitor - underneath the bush)

Sad to say, though, that none of them survived more than 12 hours.

We've even named our janitor fish, "Oscar" the night we got them.

The next morning, I researched more about how to

take care of your pet fish and your aquarium.

I was able to convince Jesse to get an aerator for our aquarium

(which we didn't have at first).

C was looking for all three of them when he woke up.

It was kind of sad to tell him, "all gone!"

By the end of Feb., we cleaned out our aquarium and

waited for some of our aquarium stuff to come in the mail
(they are much cheaper from Amazon than the pet stores).

The weekends of February were filled with chatting with my only
sister, which we both enjoyed.
C loved hanging out with her when we were in the Philippines.

It wasn't also long before we bought the 3 fish that
C counted from 1-10 perfectly on his own
(even though he didn't pronounce them right).
Now he keeps counting every time.

So far that's it.

iHeartFaces - Best Face in February

2011-03-07T18:56:00.000-08:00

iHeartFaces is doing a new challenge called "Best Face in February"where we can enter what we think is the bestface we've taken for the month of February this year.
Nothing else came up in my mindother than my son's big smile:

It's one of my favorite pictures of him!

This was one of those days when I grabbed my camera

and he saw it, then he randomly gave me this big smile. I thought it was funny.

Now he always gives me a big smile

whenever I "try" to take pictures of him secretly.

Click on the button on top of this post to view more "faces" entries.

It's really fun!

Lately...

2011-03-04T09:04:00.000-08:00

Well, I'm 15 weeks pregnant now.

My baby bump is showing just a little bit now,
especially whenever I wear my new jeans from Motherhood Maternity.
(Have you ever noticed how ridiculously expensive good maternity clothes are?
Except when you buy them from Ross, of course, or Walmart).

I go to bed at the same time our son goes to bed.

I try - ALL THE TIME - not to, because hubby wants/needs my company

every night (let's watch "24"... shall we?)
We just recently finished the last season of 24 which I am happy about.
We watched 5 episodes (45 minutes each) on our
last night watching it.

In 2 weeks, we'll find out the gender of our baby.
We are planning to do it this way:
Jesse will be the only one to know first, and then
he'll/we'll do something soon enough that will let me know the gender
of the baby.
I'm excited!

C is learning to express himself more and more each day,
including his tantrums - which are not so bad.
He's pretty good with time-outs, although he'll cry at first.
He tries to talk now even though most of the time
they're still just babbled words.
Sometimes I can make out what he's trying to say,
sometimes I can't.
When we can't, he'll take our fingers (he'll say "hand"), and take us
to wherever he was talking about.
It's really cute.
All in all, he's a happy little guy, and very easy to take care of.
I love his sweet personality.

March 1, 2011

2011-03-01T20:45:00.000-08:00

C and I welcomed the beginning of March

with some dancing...

These are only two of the handful of nursery songs
he danced to today.
Besides these, he loves doing "Itsy-Bitsy Spider",
"Wheels on the Bus"
"Pat-a-Cake"
and a few others which I can't remember.
He's currently learning the song, "Little Indians"
(One, little two, little three little Indians),
the Alphabet song (which I've been singing to him ever since
he was just a few months old),
"Baa-baa Black Sheep"
and the Tagalog version of "my toes, my knees, my shoulders, my head."

One of the Many Reasons Why...

2011-02-17T16:34:00.000-08:00

I smile and laugh everyday:

His silly self makes me laugh.

He's so fun to be with.

I love my little man so much!

I really think little children's laughs and smiles are contagious.

I love his smiles - especially like the one in the last picture.

It always makes me happy.

Baby #2

2011-02-17T10:25:00.000-08:00

We had our first appointment two days ago.

We finally saw our baby!

Caleb was such a good boy the whole time,

and he seemed really curious at the ultrasound image.
We told him that the baby in the picture is his little sibling.

He's still kind of oblivious about it all, I think.

Anyway, our doctor is really nice.

She is really friendly.

We were actually in doubt at first if she IS really our doctor

because she looked young to be one and

she was really friendly.

We were expecting somebody like Dr. Chapman

whom we had in Hawai'i (really serious person).

Dr. Ivie (our doctor now) just seemed like one of the nurses there,

but no, she's our doctor and I'm glad to have her.

She made everything exciting and friendly.

The staff were really nice and friendly, too.

They said I was 13 weeks and 3 days pregnant

and that my due date will be on Aug. 20.

When Dr. Ivie did the ultrasound, she was like,

"oh yeah, you are very far along, all right!"

I was surprised to see the baby, too.

I was expecting like a peanut-size, no-baby-figure kind of image

before I saw the ultrasound,

but our baby is there in a baby form!

We saw the heartbeat.

So cute.

back side

hello world!

We will know the gender next month.

Maybe I can ask our doctor to get us some

"feetsies" shot.. :)

My Little Helper

2011-02-03T14:30:00.000-08:00

C is teething - all four of them.

I call them the "fangs."

Hehe.
He's been a good sport about all of it, though.
He still needs to work on his sleeping habits a little better.

His new favorite song that I sing to him

is "The Wise Man and the Foolish Man."

He tries to imitate the actions I made up for that song, too.

Right now all he does is pound his hands together throughout the whole song

(even though it's for the "... build his house upon ..." part).

He recently discovered that it's fun to sit

on his little colorful stool while playing his "piano" after

the day I did it to him.

He still loves his bath times.

Now when I ask him, "do you want to take a bath?"

he runs to the bathroom and helps me get the tub ready for him.

He's slowly becoming my little helper.

On diaper duties, he likes to take his dirty diaper

straight to the trash can - in the kitchen - for me/us.

And sometimes he'll even help us put away all his diapering stuff.

Last night Jesse showed me that C was wiping his own bottom with his wipes

instead of his daddy doing it for him.

It was cute.

When we ask and show him where to put his toys away,

he'll stow them away whichever spot we wanted him to put it away.

Sometimes he requires us to go with him to his bedroom

as he puts his toys away.

He likes to make a mess with his snacks,

but he'll clean up after himself when we tell him (& help him) to pick them up.

He still loves the camera.

He loves it even more now.

We always think it's funny whenever he stops to smile for me

when I am about to take a picture of him.

Oh... and the "No" stage is definitely here.

I still think it's too early but oh well...

I will post all about our Ice Box Canyon hike

some other time or day in our family blog

when I get the chance.

It was a fun hike.

I'll Stand By You - Carrie Underwood

2011-01-27T17:11:00.000-08:00

I am totally in-love with this song.

She has an amazing voice.

Anyway, C and I fell asleep together earlier today

after lunch while cuddling on the couch.
I woke up 15 mins. after, his hair was soaking wet with sweat.

I moved US to the master bedroom, but

he couldn't go back to sleep anymore so I played with him for a while

'til he became sleepy again.

My little one let me play my guitar too,

and this is what he listened to:

Somehow the video is messed up in the beginning
when I uploaded it on Youtube.

This guitar has been with me since 2005.
It stuck with me even though I don't know how to play
that much.
I learned how to play guitar all by myself.
I taught myself how to read the guitar chord chart when I was 12,
and tried to play as much as I can.
But up until now, I only know the basics.
I hardly even know how to tune my own guitar.
(I don't have the ears to tune my guitar).
This guitar's tuning was really messed up before my brother helped me out
through skype.
But then after that, it got messed up again, so I TRIED to tune it
as best as I can before I played this song, so it might be
a little bit out of tune still.

This song is pretty easy so I loved it more.
I wish I could sing, but I can't, so I just played Carrie Underwood's voice
in the background while I played.

And yes! I know my shirt is worn the wrong way... hehe!
The tag at the back of the shirt hurts so I wore it that way.
P.S.
I love my little number one fan towards the end.

Emotional Roller Coaster #1

2011-01-21T15:08:00.000-08:00

So here's the thing...

I've been looking forward to this day since we got back

from the Philippines.
This was supposed to be the day that we'll see

if there's really someone in my belly.

You see, since the day I found out I was pregnant,
it seemed unreal - up to this point.

Except for the food cravings every once in a while

and the need for nap times more than ever,

I feel normal.

Even much more normal than I did when I was pregnant with Caleb.

Add my "still kind of flat" (but feels bloated) belly to that,

I don't feel pregnant at all.

Two lines won't be enough for me,

though I am already grateful for that confirmation.

But I still need to see our peanut-sized (or is it smaller?) baby.

I understand that we should've arrived a little earlier

than my scheduled appointment today.
But come on... 4 mins. late wasn't that bad!

The receptionist was still going to let me go through the check-up,

but not even a minute after we got in

(I literally haven't finished writing my first name),

the Dr. called and said she's leaving.

AND THEY DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING TO HER!
I was there!

I would understand if we weren't there and they had to reschedule us,

but we were there.

I was literally holding back my tears while the receptionist

rescheduled my appointment for next month on the 11th.

I guess that's another confirmation, besides the two lines,

that I am pregnant.
I was so emotional today, I cried.

Poor Jesse.

I didn't want him to see it but I couldn't hold it back anymore

as we started driving back home.

No Right of Way

2011-01-18T16:27:00.000-08:00

6 1/2 years after I left the Philippines,

I found myself with a camera bag on my back,

a duffle bag on one hand,

and my passport and "green card" on the other hand.

I was standing behind a Filipino family at the immigration line at around 6:30pm.

My husband and my son were in the "non-Filipino citizen" line

(I forgot what it's actually called).

A few moments later, we passed by the customs

then out the door.

It took us by surprise because NAIA was completely different

from all the airports we "flew into" back in the US.

Outside the door of the "baggage claim" and customs

were lanes for taxi cabs.

None else.

I didn't have an updated number of my family members,

and the first security guard I asked about where to go had a very bad attitude.

One security guard was nice to us, though.

Jesse bought a sim card at the airport.

We thought that our phones accepts sim cards.

But they don't!

Oh we were so prepared for this... right.

The nice guard lent us his cellphone and I tried all the numbers

of my family members that I had in my phone.

None worked.

It took a while before the security guard advised Jesse to cross the street,

walk down the other building,

and look for the letter "S" (for our surnames).

Jesse found my family there.

So that was one surprise I didn't expect - NAIA was different.

Meeting 2 of my 7 siblings after 6 1/2 years didn't feel anything new to me.

It felt like I saw them yesterday.

My other siblings were waiting in Pampanga.

What took me in complete culture shock was the traffic

and the kind of Filipino drivers I forgot we had.

This sunk in when we entered Edsa:

(Not my pictures)

Good thing it was dark.

I didn't completely see how really crazy it was.

But still... the traffic was long.

And the word "right of way" doesn't exist there.

Literally.

Whether you're a pedestrian or not.

(Anywhere in the Philippines, except when there are traffic lights,

pedestrians NEVER have the right of way).

Buses don't care if they crash into you.

If you're driving a car, you better make way for those buses.

Motorcycles slipped through no matter how thin

the passage was.

Vehicles changed lanes without any regards

for the other vehicles behind (or in front of) them.

They will change lanes even with the smallest inch of space they see.

And say it was 5 lanes - it became 6 lanes all just because

everybody was making their way through the traffic their own way,

thus making the traffic even heavier and longer.

Vehicles were literally bumper to bumper and shoulder to shoulder,

with just a few inches apart.

It was crazy.

I don't wanna have to drive through that kind of traffic.
Well at least it's not that crazy here in the US,
not that I know of.. yet..
and police officers catch you if you violate the traffic laws.
Thank goodness for those who really fulfill their obligations.

...

2011-01-18T10:49:00.000-08:00

Why, hello blogging world!
I am back!

I cannot come up with a title for this post,

thus the dots.

Anyway, as most of you know, we just got back from the Philippines.

It was a nice experience.

We went home a little earlier than planned, but it's all good.

What was important was that we were able to spend

so much time with my family.

And at least we were able to do one big activity with them

at the Hundred Islands in Pangasinan.

Jesse was so sweet to these little kids during our stop-over at the Governor's island.

They are already trying to make a living at their young age.

The little girl, I think, was the oldest.

Jesse bought 3 key chains (one for him, one for C, and one for me) from them.

The little girl wrote our individual names on each shell.

I didn't say anything but I was touched by Jesse's interest in them.
He was talking to them as if he had known them for a long time.
I felt deeply grateful for the kind of man I married.

When we moved to the Quezon island, these little kids followed us there.

I guess they were fond of Jesse - my American husband who speaks Tagalog really well.

We had a good time in the Philippines.
We weren't able to visit Jesse's area during his mission,

but we will do it someday when we go back.

Going Home

2010-12-27T07:56:00.000-08:00

We are going home in my country for a vacation.

I have mixed feelings about this.
I am excited, giddy, nervous, and anxious.

I am pretty sure I will experience some culture shock

in my own culture sometime.

It's been a long, long time.

I'm not sure if I am still used to riding jeepneys and passing

my "bayad" (payment) from one passenger to another to the driver,

unless I'm sitting behind the driver's seat or

the passenger's seat.

I'm not sure if I am still used to use "tabo" and "timba"

(dipper and bucket)

to take a shower - a cold shower, even.

I hope it's at least lukewarm... but I don't recall our showers

back home being lukewarm unless we boil some water.

I'm not sure if I am still used to getting burned

by the hot sun, like how it feels like

when you're standing close to the fire in a bon fire.

I would probably stand out in the crowd,

what with my darker skin than before

(back home the fairer you are, the more beautiful you are),

unmanaged wavy hair

(most, if not all, people there have straightened their hair permanently)

and poor sense of style

(people out there can go crazy with their outfits).

When I left, I was a 19-year old girl with 2 1/2 semesters left

to finish my bachelor's degree in Computer Science.

I had a few friends in our Church, and a lot more outside the Church.

I didn't think of anybody else but myself and my family.

I was worried about going to a foreign land,

not knowing anybody,

and having to speak in a different language (that I already knew at least).

I actually didn't feel anything else other than that.

I was already planning then to return home for a vacation a year after - which

turned into 2 years, 3 years, and so on.

Who knew I wouldn't be able to go home even 2 1/2 years after I graduated

and got my bachelor's degree in Information Systems?

Certainly not me.

Fast forward 6 1/2 years, I am now in my mid-20's,

a wife and a stay-home mom with a toddler

with a whole different circle of friends, and most of them

are members of our Church.

They were not just all Filipinos, but a mixture of different nationalities.

I didn't have my degree when I left.

Now I have it.

I am accustomed to the cultures of my new home,

and am now nervous to be soaked in my own culture in my native land.

I am excited for Jesse.

He's been looking forward to visiting his mission area

ever since before he met me.

I'm looking forward to him meeting my siblings for the first time.

I'm looking forward to showing him some historical places Manila,

which he was never really able to visit when he was on his mission,

and also places were I grew up.

We always moved from one apartment to another (up until now).

I am really excited to spending time with him in the country that we both love.

I am excited for Caleb.
He'll finally be able to meet his uncles and aunts,

and his cousins.
He will be soaked, at least even just for three weeks,

in his mother's native language.

And he'll be able to see the land of his "other citizenship"
(we just found out recently that he's a naturally born dual citizen - American and Filipino).

On Christmas Day

2010-12-25T00:20:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas everybody!

On the 1st day of Christmas

2010-12-24T08:00:00.000-08:00

This song is far too common or always heard that we hardly listen to the message of the song. I had a hard time looking for the really complete version of this song before I found this video. His lyrics are also altered a bit, and he skipped the third verse (that's why I added the little girl's version at the bottom. She sang the third verse at 2:11 timestamp). Check the Wordpress one for, I think the original one. Most of the ones who sang this song (including Celine Dion and Josh Groban) didn't include the second verse, which is my favorite part of the song (especially the "behold your King" part). Today, I want you to try, as you listen to the song, to read the lyrics and really take into your heart its meaning.

Oh holy night, the stars are brightly shining,

It is the night of our dear Savior's birth.
Long lay the world in sin and error pining,
'Til He appeared and the soul felt its worth.
A thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices.
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn!
Fall on your knees! Oh hear the angel voices!
Oh night divine! Oh night when Christ was born.
Oh night divine! Oh night, oh night divine!

Led by the light of a faith serenely beaming,
With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.
So led by light of a star is sweetly gleaming,
Here came the wisemen from out of the Orient land.
The King of kings lay in lowly manger;
With all our trials, born to be our friend.
He knows our need, to our weakness no stranger,
Behold your King! Before the lowly bend!
Behold your King! Your King! Before Him bend!

Truly He taught us to love one another,
His law is love and His gospel is peace.
Chains shall He break, for the slave is our brother.
And in His name all oppression shall cease.
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
Let all within us praise His holy name.
Christ is the Lord! Then ever, ever praise we,
Noel! Noel! Oh night, oh night divine!
Noel! Noel! Oh night, oh night divine!
Noel, Noel! Oh night, oh night divine!

This is one of my favorite songs that is being played during the Christmas season. I really love this song. I always sang it when I was just a little girl. But I only knew the first verse then. I heard the complete song 2 years ago in my grandparents' ward at church. A member of their ward sang it and he did so well, it sent chills down my spine. The second and third verses always hit home for me.

I don't like doing the shortcut of the word "Christmas" like other people do (they write it as x-mas). For me (in my opinion), it's basically taking out the very word/name to whom the holiday season is being celebrated for.

Let's not forget, while opening our Christmas gifts, what the true meaning of Christmas is. It is to celebrate our Savior's birth. I am eternally grateful and indebted for His birth. Without Him, we will not have the chance to go back to our Heavenly Father's presence.

Merry Christmas!

Breath of Heaven (Amy Grant)

2010-12-22T08:05:00.000-08:00

Today I was thinking about the woman

who was courageous to accept her calling

to carry the Savior in her womb.

Because of her (and Joseph's) willingness and acceptance

of what she was called to do, our Savior was born.

I cannot speak for Mary.

I don't know how or what she felt

when she carried the Savior in her womb.

Or how she felt when they were looking for a place

to stay the night she went into labor.

She had a lot of things that she went through.

But I've been pregnant before.

I've experienced what it is like to fear the unknown.

Although my experience is totally different from hers,

I could, at least in some little ways, relate to the song and think

that maybe that's how she felt.

But like I said, I don't know how she really felt.

I love this song.

I have traveled many moonless nights

Cold and weary with a babe inside.

And I wonder what I've done.

Holy Father, You have come.

And chosen me now to carry Your Son.

I am waiting in a silent prayer.

I am frightened by the load I bear.

In a world as cold as stone,

Must I walk this path alone?
Be with me now, be with me now.

Breath of heaven, hold me together.

Be forever near me, breath of heaven.

Breath of heaven, lighten my darkness,

Pour over me Your Holiness,

For You are Holy, breath of heaven.

Do you wonder, as you watch my face,

If a wiser one should have had my place?
But I offer all I am for the mercy of Your plan.

Help me be strong.

Help me be.. help me!

Breath of heaven, hold me together.
Be forever near me, breath of heaven.

Breath of heaven, lighten my darkness,

Pour over me Your Holiness,

For you are Holy!

Breath of heaven, hold me together,

Be forever near me, breath of heaven.

Breath of heaven, lighten my darkness,

Pour over me Your Holiness,

For you are Holy!

Breath of heaven.

Stardust

2010-12-19T16:35:00.000-08:00

I made this card for a family who are members in our ward at church.

They're expecting to have their baby soon while we're gone.
I made this simple card last night

so that we could give this to them today at church because

today's PROBABLY the last time they'll see us before they have their baby.

The wording/sentiment is a Stampendous rubberstamp called Baby Stardust.

(Image from Stampendous)

I got it from the nearby Michael's store.

And since the sky blue rubber stamp ink that I bought a while back

DRIED OUT before I ever even opened it,

I just used the extra fine tip end of a matching sky blue color

double ended Le Plume marker

(the other end is a brush tip, both great for rubberstamping),

and wrote over the words again.

It actually took me a while to figure out the layout I wanted to do

because I made some errors here and there.

But it's good that everything worked out.

The "message page" was not so elaborately designed because

I was really sleepy last night but I think

it still turned out ok.

And towards the end, I figured I'd use a skyblue gel pen for the dots

of the wording because the "teddy bear" sticker/embellishment I used had glitter on it,

and I used that same gel pen to write my message.

Unfortunately my handwriting is like a first grader's when I use gel pens -

totally different from my normal handwriting... hehe!