Advice Wipes

I am grateful to have parents and parents-in-law who never dictated/instructed us how to raise our children. They let us learn this all on our own and trust our instincts, and only gave us advice when we asked.

I have long since stopped giving advice to any one in any thing, especially anything about parenting, unless they asked me. These are some of my experiences of a wake-up call:

1) Back some years ago, a mom with a second adopted baby cried out on Facebook that she is having a tough time. Having had a second baby myself, having known how dreadful postpartum depression is, having BEEN THERE and thinking that she doesn't even have to deal with the pains of recovering from birthing or engorgement, I eagerly jumped up and commented it will be okay and it will pass. A mutual friend commented that whoever says that don't really know what they are talking about ... how the heck should they know what they are talking about because they do not know what you are going through. Of course it offended me because I have had PPD, I have had a hard time recovering emotionally and physically, and I felt totally qualified to say IT WILL PASS, it will be okay. But then I realized it was not my place to say such things. It was not what that mom needed to hear from me.

2) In no way bragging, my kids were always good travelers when we used to live in Las Vegas. Our drive to my in-laws usually took 6 hours, and we have survived it without iPads or iPhones in the car (except for me, haha!). One day one of my close friends got a van with those built-in DVD players and she posted on Facebook how happy she was that her kids now can watch movies while they drive. I arrogantly commented, "I'd rather talk to my kids" and she casually responded, "ouch." I felt like slapping my face for hurting her and I immediately apologized.

3) If any of you remember my post some months ago about an "On This Day" post I made when my first child was a toddler, you will recall that I said the AAP suggests no more than 1 hr (or something) of watching tv for toddlers 2 and up and none at all for babies younger than that. I bragged, saying we have survived our days without TV, etc. On my "On This Day" repost, I said I was laughing at my past self (because ever since J was born, that parenting style went outside the window even though I only let C watch nursery things like the alphabet, colors, shapes, etc). I saw that younger version of me as an arrogant, pompous parent, and I was laughing at my her thinking "Oooh, you're in so much trouble."

So, yes, I have stopped (and still trying to stop) giving unsolicited advice to parents on how to raise their kids unless I was asked how I did certain things. The only thing that matters is that they love them and that they are doing the best they can in the best way they know how while dealing with their own weaknesses and shortcomings.

 Elder M. Russell Ballard has said, "There is no one perfect way to be a good mother. Each situation is unique. Each mother has different challenges, different skills and abilities, and certainly different children. The choice is different and unique for each mother and each family. Many are able to be “full-time moms,” at least during the most formative years of their children’s lives, and many others would like to be. Some may have to work part-or full-time; some may work at home; some may divide their lives into periods of home and family and work. What matters is that a mother loves her children deeply and, in keeping with the devotion she has for God and her husband, prioritizes them above all else."  (Daughters of God, Apr. 2008)

Note to Self: The Last Time

My husband showed this post to me when we just had our 3rd baby, and I was going through a rough and tough time. Wanted to share it as well to you. (I googled the poem again):

The Last Time

From the moment you hold your baby in your arms,

you will never be the same.

You might long for the person you were before,

when you had freedom and time,

And nothing in particular to worry about.

You will know tiredness like you never knew it before,

And days will run into days that are exactly the same,

Full of feedings and burping,

Nappy changes and crying,

Whining and fighting,

Naps or a lack of naps,

It might seem like a never-ending cycle.

But don't forget...

There is a last time for everything.

There will come a time when you will feed your baby

for the very last time.

They will fall asleep on you after a long day

And it will be the last time you ever hold your sleeping child.

One day you will carry them on your hip,

then set them down,

And never pick them up that way again.

You will scrub their hair in the bath one night

And from that day on they will want to bathe alone.

They will hold your hand to cross the road,

Then never reach for it again.

They will creep into your room at midnight for cuddles,

And it will be the last night you ever wake to this.

One afternoon you will sing "the wheels on the bus"

and do all the actions,

Then never sing them that song again.

They will kiss you goodbye at the school gate,

The next day they will ask to walk to the gate alone.

You will read a final bedtime story and wipe your last dirty face.

They will one day run to you with arms raised,

for the very last time.

The thing is, you won't even know it's the last time

Until there are no more times, and even then,

it will take you a while to realise.

So while you are living in these times,

Remember there are only so many of them

And when they are gone,

You will yearn for just one more day of them

For one last time.

- Author unknown

I've had some of these last times with my eldest and I do miss those times with him. I still have two young-uns to give me those again for one last time.

Salt Dough Footprint

Little princess' foot print.

This was my daughter's footprint at 3 months old. Hers turned out so much better than her brothers' foot/hand prints that I did years ago. I think it's because I didn't have a rolling pin back then, and I didn't have a good bowl/cutter to cut the dough with back then.

Same recipe, though.

SALT DOUGH RECIPE:

1 cup flour

1 cup salt

1/2 cup warm water

• Combine flour and salt in a bowl. Mix well.
• Make a well in the middle of the bowl of dry ingredients, and pour in the water. Mix and knead into a dough. Add water until desired texture is reached. 1/2 cup for me was good enough.
• Roll the dough into a ball, and flatten with a rolling pin until the dough is about 1/4 inch thick.
• Make the print. (For me, it worked better when I made the footprint first before cutting the dough).
• You can use a clear bowl (to see if the print is in the middle of the cut you're about to make) or cookie cutters to cut the dough.
• Either air dry the masterpiece, or put in the oven at 200°F for 1 ½ to 2 hours or more, depending on your oven.
• When done, you can either leave the dough as is or paint it (some say acrylic is best).

Our oven back when I made her brothers' prints didn't warm enough at 200°F, whereas our oven now got a lot warmer at that temperature and "baked" the dough perfectly, so just keep watch of yours.

Be sure to make a hole before leaving the dough to air dry or "bake" if you want to hang it somewhere. My boys' prints went inside a shadow box frame (as shown below) - before they broke into pieces. I think I made their dough too thick. Hopefully our little girl's print will be just fine.

The boys' foot prints from years ago.

Christmas Crafts 2014

So I haven't posted for a while, and then I remembered the crafts I made this month (both by myself and with our kids). These are all ideas from Pinterest.

 Craft #1. Original source here.

Paper star

Craft #2. Original source here.

Paper wreath

Craft #3. Original source here.

Snowmen (and girl) foot prints

I was also considering making paper snowflakes with C, and a "snowman" made out of boxes, but decided we can do them next year. I think we did a pretty good job making at least 3 crafts. That is more than I ever did in the past Christmases we had.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

How was your Christmas?

38 Weeks

The crib is set up. The pack-n-play, too (because our room is small to put the crib in there, so her crib stayed in her room while her pack-n-play is going to be in our room while she's sleeping with us). I've taken the diaper box out (old diapers from J, they don't expire you know) and stored it in her room along with my personal nursing things. I've washed her "just enough" amount of clothes (we still need to get her some winter clothes, she only has mostly onesies and footed sleepers haha!), folded and tucked them neatly away.

My planner has been filled since last Sunday to the day before she's due to come - things I need to do/clean/prepare (freezer meals, anyone?) before the big day - if she does wait 'til that day. The hospital bag lay open on her crib, waiting to be filled with last items like toiletries or cellphone chargers. The rechargeable batteries have been collected and are now being charged for future repeated use (crib mobile, swing, vibrating chair, toys, etc).

I look at my planner and see that on a particular day, I have to clean this and that because it will probably be months before I get to do it again (*cough* the oven, for example, which was, and still is, really dirty when we moved in). "Ooh, maybe sterilize her bottles on this day so it's not so far away from her due date." Clean the bathrooms, clean the shower, clean the windows and glass doors (also dirty when we moved in, like it hasn't been cleaned for more than a year), clean the vents (also dirty when we moved in. They can actually catch on fire easily with the amount of dust stuck in them), clean the floors, etc. I am nesting, my heart and spirit are willing but my body isn't.

I am big. Well, at least my belly is big. I can't find a comfortable position anymore. Not sitting up, not lying down, and definitely not standing up. I can't count how many times I almost fell trying to go downstairs just because I can no longer see where I'm stepping at, and most of the time it's when I walked my son to school.

Yes, walk. I hate it now because it hurts me. Well at least I hate it FOR NOW while I'm in pain doing it, but I like the short moment it gives me each way to be with my boys and not anything else. Plus it's like a forced kind of exercise before I give birth, walking to and from school five days a week.

Sleeping is a pain. Literally. I've been having a lot of Braxton Hicks lately and aside from having to wake up every 30 minutes or so to go pee, sometimes the Braxton Hicks keep me up an hour or two a stretch on the nights that it visits me. I just look at it this way: I can go back to sleep right away. With a newborn, that's not the case. Especially if you're the one with the food supply. So for now I'll take the pains and discomfort and cherish how I actually have it easier right now.

It's kind of nerve-wracking thinking that next weekend is my last weekend with just our two boys and then our lives will change again. She'll join our small family and my routine will be thrown off. To be honest, I have mixed feelings at the moment. Knowing how I've been with my first two children, I am scared that I will be the same when she comes. You know, the baby blues. Emotional roller coaster, constant sickness (I think it was mastitis though I was never diagnosed because I never went to see a doctor each time I got sick), loneliness, fatigue, etc. The whole package.

And J. I wish I could spend more time alone with him now that his older brother is in school. I've enjoyed the short time (a month by the time I give birth) of alone time I've had with him - something we never really had since he was born. It made our bond stronger as a mother and son. I got to know him more. I wish I could do more for him - take him to places, run with him (I can't), play more "boyish" stuff with him, read comfortably with him, explore this new State we live in with him - now that we have the chance to be together, just me and him. But I can't. I am limited to my limited amount of daily strength that I need to share with all of my boys/man. At times I want this just-me-and-J-time to last longer - a couple of months more or so with me in full capacity to do a lot more than I can now with him - to make up for the three years that he hardly had any chance to spend one-on-one time with me. But that's not possible. How am I ever going to give him that alone-time attention again that he just barely got? I think in some ways I'm not ready to give it up just yet.

But despite all these fears and anxiety, along with the unknown of raising a daughter (it really feels like being a first-time parent all over again), I am ecstatic to meet our little girl. I am excited to hold her, to smell her, to let her share her innocence with me, with her Dad, and her brothers. I am excited to let her feel she is loved, and to feel her love as well. So many good things in store as she grows up with her brothers. What a blessing she is to us. C is very excited to meet her. He gives my belly kisses and hugs more than five times a day, and whispers, "I love you baby sister!" Lately he's been pretending that she answers him with, "I love you too!" J is now slightly aware he's about to have a baby sister, but still kind of oblivious to it. I'm surely gonna miss him a lot when she comes, the same way I missed C when he came. But I am ready and excited to welcome our daughter into this world.

Tres

Hi!

I turned three!

I had a simple birthday celebration with my family. My mom let me have some ice cream while my kuya was away with our Dad to his school orientation.

Then we had fun with the sprinklers in our backyard!

And then my mom made spaghetti - one of my favorites - for dinner. I devoured it, just like my kuya.

And then they sang the Happy Birthday song for me as my Dad brought out my cookies and cream pie.

And lastly, I opened my birthday gift from my Dad and Mom - a bubble-blowing lawn mower toy! (Fisher Price Bubble Mower) I love it so much! I'm glad mom got the right gift this time, haha!

I still love cuddling with my mom, especially in the mornings and while we watch some movies at home. I still like to destroy things and figure out why that happens - or how? I am interested in anything and everything that I don't have a particular favorite toy or thing to do. I like baths and showers and splashing in the water! And I looooooove FOOD! Recently I've taken an interest into singing all the time. Sometimes I even make up my own songs.

I like watching my kuya do his school things like reading his books, writing letters, numbers, and shapes. I'm excited for the day that I will be able to do it, too. I enjoy asking mom to draw me this or that (usually shapes). I still love climbing on things. I'm a happy little big boy!

Love,
J

The Big Move

It's been really really busy lately. For those of you who do not know, we're moving to the east coast for my husband's "job relocation." I think I lost sense of my inner clock since we have been doing a lot of traveling since the last days of June.

We are moving to Baltimore, MD! Tonight will be the last night we will all sleep on our beds, and it won't be until 2 or 3 weeks until we sleep on them again. Tomorrow, the professional movers are coming in at 8:00 am to pack our things, and someone else is taking away our Toyota Sienna minivan for shipping. Also, tomorrow will start our hotel life until our things arrive in Baltimore. We fly to Baltimore this weekend. It'll be our youngest's first time to fly in an airplane. We're so excited to see him experience that!

I'm blogging right now because I feel like I will lose my mind if I don't. I need some sort of outlet. I am so stressed just thinking of the days ahead, or even the next hour to come. There's just so many things to do before and after the move (i.e. packing, unpacking, finding a new doctor, changing address, internet connection, etc.) I wish I could do more than I can at the moment, but my hefty belly and aching body prevents me from doing so. But it's good to know that I am more than healthy enough to do enough. What's left right now is packing our remaining things that we need to bring with us for the start of our hotel life, and getting the pantry rid of food to be donated to the food bank, I think? That, and cleaning the house on Friday. CLEANING! Friday stresses me out most, I think.

How do I feel about this move? I am excited, anxious, and everything else mixed together. I sure love the green - trees, grass, bushes. Something I've been looking forward to. And oh, lots of things to do with our children! My husband and I never actually lived in a state/city where it snowed a lot for a long time, so this winter will be our first white Christmas! I got tired of living in the desert that I'm actually ready to leave it. The only thing that's making me not want to move is because I will AGAIN be pulled far away from my family and friends. I don't know if it's my pregnancy hormones, but sometimes I feel like I always have to be the one that has to deal with the loneliness of being away from family and friends.

But I can't complain. Believe it or not, I do see the blessings that came with this new transition and new page in our book of life as a family unit. Both material and spiritual things. And just thinking of those gives me enough strength to carry on and know that I can do this. It will be a good, fresh start. Looking forward to our new life!

P.S. - This makes all of our children born in 3 different states! Isn't that cool! ^.^

I'm Five

Hello there!

I turned five today!

I will be attending Kindergarten soon! My favorite things are still race cars. I love learning new things. I love to write and read. I love drawing as well as coloring. I like to show my little brother how to write, and trace numbers and drawings. I love to dance, especially dancing Jabbawockeez numbers. I love ice cream, raisins, waffles, peanut butter, bagel and cream cheese, spaghetti, candy, chocolate, peanuts, crackers, dried mangoes, and anything that is not GREEN. I still love to read. I love saying my prayers before eating and before going to bed. I love watching movies, especially animated movies like Legos.

When I grow up, I want to be a race car driver. My parents say I'm a good boy and I'm easy to take care of. Sometimes I still throw a tantrum at them but most of the time I obey what they say. I was told I'm a good helper, too.

I am excited to meet our little sister someday. And I am looking forward to celebrating my 5th birthday today!

Love, C

Growing Pains

Well, it's been another while since my last update.

C has graduated from preschool. He loved preschool and he loved making friends there. He's turning five soon and I'm a little sad that we aren't throwing him a party with his friends and/or cousins over. It'll be just another simple birthday celebration. Heck I don't even know yet what to do for him on that day, but I'm sure we'll have fun.

J is still his silly, will-powered self. He's beginning to construct sentences better. It's cute and all, but it also kind of makes me sad that my baby is indeed growing up. He's getting better in using the toilet to do his business, even with going #2. Potty training him this time around had been so much easier for all of us than the first time we tried.

My husband applied for an assistant controller a few weeks back, got through the interviews (phone and in-person), and now we are looking at many weekends ahead full of traveling because he got the job. We'll be traveling for house hunting where we'll be moving, and traveling to see family and friends before we leave our close proximity to them. It's going to be a busy month and maybe even after we've settled down. More on this on a different post later.

And me, still growing. I'm 24 weeks pregnant as of today. My little princess is living up to her reputation as the princess of this household. She has been harder to carry than her two older brothers. I always find myself exhausted - a lot more exhausted than I was in my previous pregnancies - and in pain. Just pain everywhere. Sometimes it even hurts my everything when I walk, or when I roll over in bed. I don't know if that has something to do with placenta previa but most days I just want to lie down in bed and have a maid clean the house, or a babysitter to take care of our kids, or a chef to make us good food. I haven't been making dinner a lot because of it. I mean I've always been like that, but I'm worse now. Just glad that my husband understands and doesn't complain.

I'm a little upset that my doctor's appointment has been moved to 2 more weeks (that's 6 weeks since the last time I met her, 4 days before we leave Vegas) because she suddenly isn't available at the time they gave me and now they had to push me over to some random date to accommodate HER needs, not mine. So there's a possibility that I won't get that ultrasound before our move. We'd have to find a new doctor first which will probably take by August before I get another ultrasound. I really need that ultrasound. I just ... all I want to know is if everything's better and if so, then I can have some things, even just ONE thing, back to normal.

I think the reason why I'm in this blog post right now is not just to merely update it, but because my pathetic, insignificant disappointments are building up and I need to let some, if not all, of my steam out. So, thank you, for bearing with me. I appreciate it. :)

Note to Self: Time Well Spent

Well, here I am again. My belly is bulging and cramping, my back aches, and my eyes are heavy. But it's been a productive, albeit tiring, day. J is potty training again since yesterday, and this time I don't want to back out no matter how long it takes us. It will just get harder from here on out if I keep postponing it. I am getting bigger and more uncomfortable, and if I don't do it now I won't be able to do it until after the baby comes. All in all, he is doing good. Still no #2 (our day today started with a missed opportunity for  #2 and it landed on the bathroom floor as I was lifting him up to the toilet seat), but his #1's have been great.

I know I just said I'm exhausted. I am. Going back and forth to the bathrooms potty training a toddler is taxing for a pregnant mom of two sons, especially when the man of the house is not around. But why am I up? Well, for one, it's only 9:30 pm when I started typing this. Two, I just finished catching up with my journal so I have nothing to update about there. Three, I read too much today (as my way of waiting for J to go back and use the bathroom again). Four, I'm just not ready to go to bed. 

Well, here's one thought that's been roaming around my head. As you can see, I just started using Swagbucks again. And man does it feel like working from home.

I just met my daily goal after I put the kids to bed today.

 In the past days, as soon as I started trying to meet the daily "Swagbucks earned" goals, I noticed I've been sitting on the computer much longer than I used to - answering polls and surveys, scouring coupons, playing (not watching) videos, etc. in order to rack up points (which are redeemable with gift cards). Sure, I'm doing it to help financially, at least a little. But I've noticed I've taken my eyes off from the ones that mattered most to me longer than I needed to.

"Mom, look at this!" "Woah..." (unattentive response while eyes were glued to the monitor).

I found this one on Pinterest a while back, and it's been stuck in my head ever since.

In this day and age where everywhere we go and in everything we do, there is technology right up at our face, it's hard not to get distracted. It's hard to focus on people who are with us face-to-face while our minds are busy traveling somewhere else with some other people we see in our device. I am guilty to this. 

Sure there are good reasons for using technology. I am not at all against it. We can update our far-away families in real-time, for one. But sometimes we tend to overuse it and end up neglecting things/people that mattered more. Like my kids for me.

So here was a challenge I gave to myself about a week ago - to keep my time with technology at bay, and spend more time listening to and playing with my kids.

My action plans? 1) Sit down in front of the computer at nap times and bed times only, and/or when/if the man of the house lets me get a little break when he gets home; or when the boys want some "Jabbawockeez" dance routine moment. 2) Eat meals with them at the dining table, without my phone. This hasn't been a problem to me but I want to set an example to them, too. 3) If they do have to watch a movie, lie down on the couch and have them have a go with their "lambing" (cuddles) with me. 4) More reading and story times! I used to be great at this when we only had one child. I want to bring it back. More outdoor things done with them. Well maybe after potty training.. haha! 5) Moderation is key. Of course there are times I really have to be with technology and they need to know they don't always get everything and all of my attention all the time. Do all things in moderation - they need to learn some things by themselves and I need to do things I enjoy by myself sometimes, too. For example, sometimes I read a book while they play with each other and that's not bad, as long as I can pay attention to them as well.

 Recently I've limited my technology activity to posting my 100 Happy Days post for the day. And maybe a half hour of Facebooking here and there. Like I said, I am trying to do things in moderation. Besides, I can't sit in front of the computer for more than 30 minutes (yeah my back is killing me right now, actually).

Last thought for this long post, I was skimming through some blog posts earlier after I put the boys to bed (yay, Pull-Ups time!). Most of the comments on this one blog defended themselves together with the blogger how sometimes they really just need to be with technology even when they are at the park with their kids. I only scrolled through some and what I've noticed is this: they always have more than enough things to juggle. They have their own business (photography), blog to maintain, Facebook group to admin (2 or 3 of them), work emails, plus school and homeschooling, photo editing, etc. These are all good and I don't judge them at all. Sometimes it is what it is.

I am one of the lucky moms who had the chance to choose to stay home with our kids full-time. Some moms don't have that option, especially the single moms. And because of that, because of their own individual situation, they have to juggle a lot of things. And that's understandable. As for me though as a stay-home mom with a spouse, and this is just my opinion... if all those work load gets all of my time away from my kids even when I am with them physically and even when I say that I'm doing it for them, then I think it's not worth it. Maybe take away the work load that's not really that important, and lessen the load gradually so the extra time can be put with the family and loved ones. Let's try to put it in the eternal perspective - we aren't taking our Facebook-administered group in the next life, or our work emails, or our photography business, or what-not. The kids are only young for a fraction of our lifetime.

We decided I stay home for a reason and if I lose that purpose by spending too much of my time somewhere else, I think I will have just failed greatly. Everything in moderation. Other people really don't have a choice but to juggle multiple things in order to sustain their family. In my whole life's experience, though, more often than not we do have a choice where we put most of our time to. It is not so much as to the quantity of time spent with your loved ones, than is the quality as well. I will try to give both as much as I can. That is my goal for myself and my family.

Sorry if this sounded like a lecture or a "holier than thou" post. I didn't mean it to be. It's just one of those days where I have a screaming thought in my head and I have to write it down fast enough for me to remind myself someday.

Six Years

Before I got married and even after then, I always heard seasoned married people (or at least had several years of experience ahead of me) that the first five years is often the hardest part of marriage, that technically it's still a honeymoon stage. You are adjusting to a new lifestyle and are considering another person in your decision-making. It's not just about you anymore. It's not an "I, My, Mine, Me" lifestyle. It's an "Us, We, Ours." You can't just make a decision, especially important life decisions, on your own. Well you can if you want to, but that is not how marriage works.

Image searched through Google.

I also heard and read and was told about many other advice or words of wisdom. Like for example, "You can't change your spouse, but you can change yourself." When one of my closest friends in college was getting married, we were walking to the cafeteria when she asked me, "who is your first priority in marriage? Your children or your spouse?" I didn't know the right answer then. Well, maybe I did, but I was taken aback and wasn't able to answer for a while. I thought deeply about it, thinking about what I saw growing up. In my mother's world, we came first. At least that's how I felt. So I blurted, "my children." "Wrong," she said. "Your spouse always comes first."

Image searched through Google.

Well, it totally made sense to me. If you want your children to respect you and your spouse, you will show your spouse the kind of respect they deserve and the affection and the love and everything else. The spouse comes first, and when the children sees that, they will emulate that (hopefully) in their own marriage. It, too, will make your marriage better. Of course, I made a mental note that it will only apply - to me, at least - as long as he is not abusive or anything of that sort.

In all of my still-very-young years, I've already known the kind of man I wanted to marry. I won't get into details why, but I was really determined to meet that kind of man. Not a boy, a man. Maybe a man in a boy figure. Hehe! However, I still learned one or two more things before that day came, before the "FOR ALL TIME AND ETERNITY" came: 1) I have to qualify on certain kinds of qualifications just as much as I have a list of qualifications for the kind of man I wanted to marry. 2) Not all of those in my list about him will be checked, just as all of my list about my self-improvement will be checked before that day came.

We are past the five years, and even though it's still very early into our marriage, I feel we've grown together in this journey for the better. I have changed. I'm still not perfect, but I have changed because of his trust, love, and patience. An incredible amount of patience. Like in every marriage, there have been ups and downs. I pouted a lot. He apologized a lot. Sometimes I got on his nerves, mostly because I just won't say what's wrong when I pout. We are so different but we complement each other.

Image searched through Google.

I am glad I was able to meet that kind of man I wanted to marry. Sure I may have written a shallow "as handsome as Brad Pitt" in my list, which I doubt I did, but my husband is the best one for me. Brad Pitt is not handsome anyway, not to me at least. Haha!

If you were so curious, my list was not really long and some of them were shallow qualifications but the main ones I focused on were: he loves the Lord, respects the Priesthood, he loves me and our children, he doesn't hurt me and the children especially physically, and a responsible breadwinner. Someone who will let me stay home with the children was a plus. And he met all of these. I really don't know what I did to deserve him in my life. But he is here, he is my husband, and I couldn't be any happier. I am doing my best to continue feeding the fire, feeding the love, respecting him, thinking of him first (even though I don't make dinner on a daily basis), and basically just thinking of how I can make him happy and how I can contribute to make this marriage happy and joyful and peaceful all at the same time despite the random rain and storms at times, because he is doing his part, his 100%+ in this marriage. I couldn't have asked for anyone else.

Potty Training 2.0

We spent the last 4 days potty training J. And for the past 4 days, I've been beyond stressed and emotional about it all. I had this battle in my head to give up and try again later,  or to keep going because it will "click" sooner or later. Giving up is never my thing when it comes to parenting. And for this one I didn't want to giving up because I had this faith on J that he can do this.

I did pray for help when I was at my lowest of emotions one night. I asked to help me know what to do or how to do it among many other things. It may sound cheesy to some to pray for help with potty training. But most parents will understand that they can't always do everything on their own, especially something like a rite of passage as potty training. Most of the time in our daily lives of raising children, we need that Divine help. I also learned growing up and still hear it until now that there is no such thing as asking for a little help from our Heavenly Father. Remember when I wrote about my driver's license test? Yeah, I still stand firm in my belief that whatever we ask of Him and we do our part, if it is for our own good we will get it.

Well, what I've been getting was to try again later because J is just not ready. But it was confusing me with not wanting to give up. Today I was so stressed about it that it made me cry a lot. Maybe it had something to do with my pregnancy hormones as well, hehe! So I posted about my potty training stress in our private facebook group (moms) made by my friend, and they all said what I've been thinking about. To try again later. So for now, J is back on pull-ups because I'm still looking for his diapers at the moment, haha!.

J has certainly taught me a lot of things. For one is patience. LONG patience. LOVING patience. More kindness. More love. More understanding. More humility. We teach them that things don't always go their way. Well it goes the same way for us, too. He taught me that this weekend.

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So now I will tuck away his three sticker-filled potty charts and write in my journal what this experience has taught me. It's only been four days but I learned so many things from it. I am so glad J was born to us. He fills our lives with more "color" and more variety and more fun.. and silliness. I will always be forever grateful for the things they teach me each day. Parenthood is tough but it really is so worth it.

Random Chatters

I haven't been blogging in a while. But today is different, and today I feel like blogging rather than doing anything else while my sons took their naps.

Chatter #1:

I was sweeping the kitchen floor after having cleaned the living room floor, when I heard my two little boys arguing and stomping their feet at each other. C climbed upstairs to let his steam out, while J stayed downstairs with me and continued ranting that his kuya is on time-out (he put his kuya on time-out... really?)

I think any parent have the urge in every fiber of their parental being to step in when the children argue and fight, but I also know some parents choose not to and let the children settle it themselves as long as they're safe. I followed that today (and I do in most days if their noise wasn't bothering me). I kept on cleaning and let them at it.

Soon enough, C went downstairs. His younger brother kept nagging at him that he should go upstairs, "Kuya time-out!" he says. "No, I'm not in time-out. I just went upstairs because I was angry with you! I'm still not playing with you!" said the elderly brother, and he proceeded to slide his tiny race cars down the seat of the slightly folded metal folding chair. Little J approached him and said, "You playing, kuya, you playing?" To which his older brother replied, "Yes, I am. Come race with me."

It tugged at my heart on how quickly they got along as quickly as they fought. Then right at that moment, a song from my Pandora station played. I let it sink in my head as the song went by, "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away." I looked at my boys and just smiled, watching them play again together, with those big cheeks sticking out of their faces. They are my many rays of sunshine in this ugly desert I can't ever call home. Someday, a young lady will catch their attention. But for now I am the one, and wherever they may go, they will always be my sunshine.

Chatter #2:

As you all know by now, we are expecting baby #3. We haven't met my doctor yet, although I have an appointment set up for April (she was booked all the way til April when I called in February). No chosen name yet, as I've learned from our first experience that it kinda makes you get attached to the name and gender if you assume it so early. We already had a girl's name picked out for our first baby when we found out we were having a boy. Of course, I was happy. I wanted a boy as an eldest child. But somehow I felt I lost that little baby girl, too. Could be weird to some but that's how I felt. So I decided since then not to name the baby until we knew the gender.

We are all doing well. I am doing well. Like my last two pregnancies, it doesn't feel like I'm pregnant. Well, besides my obnoxious hormones, I don't feel pregnant. Belly bump's not quite there yet. But I can't wear my non-pregnancy jeans anymore. Here's to more waiting for April! I will post my face with the bump when I am ready, haha!

Chatter #3:

Will I ever be ready to potty train J? I think my husband is ready, but I'm not. Besides, I'll be the one who will be stuck doing it for the rest of the day. This is probably the 10th time I held off on it. I was planning to do it February. I have forgotten now what has changed my mind. Then last week was supposed to be the day we were going to do it, then I kept changing my mind to "wait til the spring break" and "wait til next week." It's just a lot harder to time it now than it was with C, because with C he didn't have any sibling that went to preschool so we were able to stay at home for as long as we needed as we potty trained him. With J, though, I am so torn because I want to do it now but I don't want to because of C's preschool schedule. I feel like it's going to take longer if we don't wait til spring break. But that's too long and too close to our anniversary where we most likely will have to go somewhere, and I don't like going anywhere when potty training. I guess we'll just wing it and see how it goes. J is aware, a little if not a lot, when he needs to/has gone to the "bathroom" so I guess that's a good thing?


It's been great to post something random again. Have a great weekend everyone!

New Stage of Stay-at-home Mommyhood

My mundane life bubble was popped in the 3rd of September when C started going to preschool. I am slowly getting my footing back again, and have constantly caught up with my journal. Not more than a week delayed (right now I am 3 days behind, haha!). I guess it's about time for another blog post.

See, I can't sleep right now that's why I'm here. I've been so accustomed to having my super handsome husband with me that when he's away for business trips, I find it hard to fall asleep.

Anyway, as of late my husband and I entered a new stage of parenthood. A new stage for me as a stay-home mom. I will not say "full-time" mom from now on, because every parent is a "full-time" parent, working or not. Our new stage is having a preschooler.

Sure, we did Joy School last year but it didn't feel like we had a kid in school because I took turns with the other moms teaching the children. This year, though, is school in a home-based preschool roughly about 9 miles away (10-min drive) from our home. The ratio is 4 children to 1 teacher. There's only one teacher, Miss S. (For my kid's and his classmate's protection, I will not mention the name of the school here).

Years ago, we decided not to send our kids to school until they turn 6 y.o. The decision was based on the book Jesse read about boys and school/academic stuff or something like that. I'm gonna have to ask him the title when he gets back.

Last year we signed up for Joy School because the moms went to the same Church with us, and C knew their children too. So basically it was all about him gaining more friends because in all honesty he didn't have much before he went to Joy School. For me it was more like a play date with learning.

C loves learning and meeting new people. We enrolled him to preschool for those same reasons, just supporting what he likes. And he is loving it. I didn't cry the first day of class because I knew he was going to have fun and I like it when he's happy and having fun with other people.

First day of Preschool.

Sometimes I still can't believe that we are now on that stage where we have a kid in school. That it has indeed started. It made me feel a lot more like a parent, especially when I started buying his school supplies. Or whenever he insists on trying to do things by himself. My baby, my sweet baby, is indeed growing up and there's nothing I can do to freeze time. All I can do is seize the moment and live in the now, encourage them and support them, do things with them, and be thankful for every moment I get to spend with them. Seeing them happy makes me happy. I am grateful that Heavenly Father allowed me this opportunity to raise His beloved children with my husband. I am filled with so much joy along with some stress here and there (haha!) on a daily basis & I will never trade it for anything. We love them, I love my family, and I love being a mother.

 

Simple Fried Rice

I've never made fried rice before. Not once in my life. But I love it. So one night I decided to try making one. I've read different recipes from the internet prior to making it to get a feel of how I should do it, and then I made it. So here it is (most of my measurements are estimates. I didn't really measure them).

Simple Fried Rice

* 2-3 cups cooked rice (depending on how many you are serving. Leftover rice from the previous day is better)

* 2-3 Tbps Sesame oil (just cover the whole pan)

* 1-2 cups frozen peas, carrots, corn, beans, etc. (thawed) - or however much you want to put it. These are the ones you buy at the frozen veggies aisle at your local department store.

* 1 small onion, chopped

* 4 cloves garlic, minced

* 2-3 eggs, beaten

* soy sauce (to taste) - I used about a little over 1/4 cup

Heat the oil in large skillet in medium-high heat. Sautee the garlic and onion slightly, then add the thawed vegetables. Stir fry until they are tender. You can then either put them in a separate container or just push them at the side of the skillet. Pour the eggs on the vacant side of the skillet  (if you didn't put the vegetables in a separate container) and cook it like a scrambled egg. Once the egg is scrambled, stir-fry it together with the vegetables.

Add the rice and the soy sauce. Stir fry until everything is well-blended/mixed and heated through.

Excuse my picture, it was taken from my cellphone.

So that's what I did. You can put anything else you want in your fried rice - boneless chicken pieces, bacon, ham, brocolli, etc. Just be sure to stir-fry the ones that takes the longest time to get cooked first. Maybe I will try my next one with oyster sauce. You can try that too!

They Day I Ordered the Wrong Food

I just finished writing about our most recent date night in my journal and I couldn't stop thinking about that night.

It was a fun night despite of what I had to eat. And thank goodness for my perfect senses, I was able to really taste it. 

We left our children with my sister as our babysitter that night. If you know my husband, he's a recent convert to Japanese food especially sushi. It's kind of funny that I was the one who was trying to make him eat MY VERSION of sushi (California rolls) and now he's the one who's trying to make me eat HIS VERSION of sushi - the real sushi (raw fish on top of rice and other shebangs). 

So for this date night, I let him decide where to eat out - as usual. And as usual, I knew where he was going to take me - to a sushi place! This time we ate at Yama Sushi. This is the fifth sushi restaurant he's taken me to, but the first one with an all-you-can-eat option. So we did that. The buffet option is $25 per head.

Of course he knows all the rolls, right? RIGHT! So he goes on ordering the one called "NO NAME." And I trust his judgments. He said it was good. And it was! Unfortunately you can only have one order of "No Name" per person so we only had two rolls of it (8 slices). 

Click on the image for the link. Photo credit to Anneli A. (Yelp user)

Another delicious roll he ordered was the "Sun of Beach." It was hard to decide which one was better. 

Click on the image for the link. Photo credit to Rafael D. (Yelp User)

He also got me some teriyaki chicken. And we added a yakitori to that (barbeque chicken kebab). 

I, on the other hand, failed at my ordered roll called "Crazy Roll." Oh it was crazy, all right! Filled with jalapenos. Yum. Not. Luckily my dearest heroic husband, my knight in shining armour, ate 4 of the six slices of that roll, including the one on my end which was fat and humongous. But there was one of my orders he wasn't a "knight-in-shining armour" enough for him to even touch with his chopsticks. They were 2 pieces per serving. The one that will be on my food taboo list for years to come. The quail eggs.

Now, at the menu it had the sign where it said it's either lightly cooked or served raw. I thought it was ultra soft-boiled eggs, so I wanted it anyway. The server came and I said, "Can I have two orders of the quail eggs, please?" The server gave me this doubtful look and said, "So, four pieces?!? Because it's two pieces per order." I really wanted a lot but you can only have two orders of it. I eat more than five boiled quail eggs back home in one sitting. In fact I think I even eat more than ten. But trying to be decent, I said, "Okay, let's start with two pieces. One order it is then." So she went off and put in the order. And there I was happily expecting to get a tiny dish of two boiled quail eggs.

I was busy munching whatever we were munching when she put it on my side of the table and I bet you she saw my eyes bulge. It was so unexpected (for me, at least) that they were served raw on top of rice wrapped in seaweed. 

Needless to say, my husband couldn't stop laughing. I had to think hard that what I ate back home was worse (it's called balut - boiled duck eggs where you eat the whole egg with the little chick inside it). But I've never had raw eggs before. Luckily, quail eggs are tiny. I picked up my chopsticks, clamped the first quail egg with rice, and aimed the raw egg to shoot right through my throat.

It wasn't so bad. Sure, I tasted the yolk. It was just like when you eat a sunny side up and the yolk runs over your rice. But the part where I slightly tasted the "white" before it slipped through my throat was one that kind of threw me off a little bit. Like I said, luckily they were small or I probably won't even touch it.

I was still going to eat the second one but the raw egg dropped on my plate when one of the servers grabbed our dirty dishes. I got distracted, all right! Not even an excuse there. Right. 

After all these, and after all the many manly fist bumps I received from my husband, I remembered they were ONLY $0.50 cents each!!!!!!  I told him, "how could you just sit down there and make me eat something gross for only a dollar?!?" This is something we will always look back to and laugh about when we grow older. The eggs were not as gross as our "balut" but raw egg is foreign to me. 

Yep, never again will I order any egg from a sushi restaurant menu unless it clearly states SCRAMBLED or BOILED. Lesson learned. 

In total we had 4 or 5 sushi rolls, chicken teriyaki, yakitori, hamachi, the quail eggs, and mochi ice cream for fifty bucks. It would have been around ninety if it wasn't a buffet. Good dinner, good experience with foreign food, and good date night!

(For more photos, check out Yama Sushi's Yelp page. Lots of Yelp users uploaded pictures of their yummy food. Maybe next time I will try the seafood salad. It seems that a lof of customers liked that one, too).

{C's Daily Prayers} - Despicable Me 2 and Lightning and Thunder

PRAYER #1:

C: "... I am thankful to watch the movie, Despicable Me, and that the minions aren't purple anymore ..."

You can tell he's not a big fan of the purple minions. They were pretty scary.

Two nights ago, C and I went out on a mommy-son date. We watched Despicable Me 2 (his ticket was free because we bought Despicable Me DVD from Amazon.com, and it came with a free movie ticket to see Despicable Me 2) in the theater after sharing a single plate of Panda Express dinner of fried rice/chow mein, and broccoli and beef entree (he doesn't eat much); and a tall cup of Tropical Smoothie chocolate shake.

He sat on my lap the entire time, which I liked. I like cuddling with my boys. The movie was hilarious. I enjoyed it even though there was a huge head blocking my view. He loved it, too.

SPOILER ALERT!!!

If you haven't seen Despicable Me 2 and don't want to see any spoilers, skip to his prayer about the lightning and thunder below. LOL! But if you have seen it or you don't mind spoilers, the minions were turned into monsters - basically eating machines, as in they eat ANYTHING - and they were purple. At the end, of course, Gru's scientist friend, Dr. Nefario, came up with the antidote and turned the minions to friendly yellow moving Twinkies again. YAY!

PRAYER #2:

C: "... I am thankful for lightning and thunder. I am thankful to see grandma again ..."

There's been a sudden thunderstorm tonight. You can see the lightning from the window blinds, and some of the thunder claps were loud and strong enough to shake our house. We were describing it to both C and J. C was taking it well, thinking "thunder" is "Kachicka!!!" and "lightning" is "Ka-Chow!!!" (Chick Hicks and Lightning McQueen in Cars movie). J, on the other hand, was a little bit scared of the thunder claps that he held on to me pretty tight.

Bad Days

This ^ is what was going through my mind (hit repeat of just one line and a blur of the other lyrics you don't know 1 million times for the next 3 days) as I swept the broken shards of our backyard door's blinds' topper (or whatever you call it). It had fallen twice and shattered the rubbery-glass material (the thingy that traps the blind inside the whole topper. Sorry I don't know what these foreign-to-me things are called) on each sides each time it fell. I was attempting to fix the broken blinds that were not aligned with their clones properly, three of them, when the topper fell on me twice. The blinds were ridiculously misaligned because my boys find it fun to play with them. I don't blame them. It's just that we are renting this house and I want to take care of it as much as we can to avoid ridiculous fees when we move out. In our past experiences where I've taken REAL GOOD CARE of the place we were renting, we were charged for things that didn't even occur or happen or break. It's pretty ridiculous how landlords and their managements take advantage sometimes.

This shattered blinds topper deal was on top of my other things that went wrong this morning. And there is still a pile of dirty dishes in the sink that I decided to leave because I was getting so flustered.

It is these kind of things that I struggle with and at the same time my source of strength - when my four-year-old didn't make it to the toilet one day while napping and accidentally spread poo everywhere (his pants, legs, bathroom floor, stairs step, and another bathroom floor), when I need my earphones and I find it all ridiculously tangled I might as well just throw it away, when I step on a toy car with pointed roofing or a piece of lego (good thing they're the huge ones, not the little ones), when J wouldn't stop shrieking at the top of his lungs because his older brother wouldn't let him have what he wanted to have, when J spills milk all over himself and on the floor, when both kids decided they don't want their naps and I was counting on that nap so I could regain my sanity by at least taking a shower, or when J wakes up a little too early from his nap, when it just seems like all elements of nature are combining against you to make you miserable hoping you'd turn into a super saiyan (anime reference), or even just because it is depressing to have another mundane day, and many other things - it's when these things happen that I feel really tested with my patience and my abilities to be a better loving wife, mother, and individual.

Of course it's not fun while it happens at the moment, but I'm sure that in the years to come it'll be things and stories that will make me laugh and think,"how was I ever so mad at that time when it seems so trivial now?" I've had my share of scoldings, always after I've told them "No" quite a lot of times and they wouldn't give heed, but I have such a big room for improvement left to try to always see the bigger picture. How we raise them now, how we discipline our kids now, will affect them in the future.

Ultimately, the important thing is trying to keep a good atmosphere in the home and filling it with love, respect, and kindness. Everything comes down to love. Would we say or do what we were about to at the moment we were flustered if we love that person? I think not. This reminds me of one thing I found on the Web (I can't find the right source):

From my own experiences, I find this true. It is so hard when the unideal way of raising a child is so engraven on you, in you, and all around your whole being, and you want to change it ... so bad. But ultimately, your love for your own family wins you over, and then you find the strength to overcome your weaknesses, especially on the bad days, and raise your own children in a more loving way. 

I don't exactly know what I'm talking about. What I know is that I am weak when it comes to these things and I can't do my responsibilities as a good parent without the help of a Higher Being, our Father in Heaven, and his "angels." 

Let us remember that it all comes down to love. When we love someone, we are kind to them, respectful to them, and we care for them. And now I must go because J decided to wake up a little too early from his nap - again. HA!

"Vectoooooor"

Monday night after dinner, my husband helped C read the scriptures he is going to share in Primary class this Sunday. Last time he was asked to give a short talk and he cried the whole time while his Daddy read it for him instead. So this time around, we want to try a better head start. I thought of letting him speak with our karaoke microphones to make it a bit more real (and I was the audience). Of course C loved that idea.

Afterwards, C and J took turns speaking through the mic. Even while I was singing some karaoke songs. They liked to bug me, "my turn, my turn!!!" ("ah-shurn" for J). C would always say something random. J only has one word: "Vector!!!!" They liked the mic so much that I was finally done singing (bathroom style), I let them go for it, taking turns:

C: "Hello, I am C___. And this is my truck and it flies. RAAAAH"
J: "Veeectoooooor!!!!!"
C: "Hello, this is C___ again and that is J_____. He loves trains and I do, too, 60 miles blah blah blah."
J: "Veeectoooooor!!!!!"
C: "I am C_____ and that is Lightning McQueen and he goes around the track and 90 miles."
J: "Veeectoooooor!!!!!"

I loved watching them and it was funny (funnier than how I could tell it here). I don't know what was the deal with Vector anyway. They started saying it a few days after we watched Despicable Me.

J says it the exact same way Vector said his name in the movie (clip below, timestamp 0:30). For those of you who don't know, this is Vector:

Kids do copy things pretty fast, don't they. What are the things your kids copy from the kiddie movies that they've watched?